Heartfelt Heartlook

Father of Truth

2012-01-13T16:07:00.001-08:00

Father of Truth Prayer

Father of Truth, behold Your Son, a sacrifice pleasing to You. Accept this offering of Him who died for me; behold His blood shed on Golgotha for my salvation. It pleads for me. For His sake, accept my offering. Many are my sins, but greater is Your mercy. When placed on a scale, Your mercy prevails over the weight of the mountains known only to You. Consider the sin and consider the atonement; the atonement is greater and exceeds the sin. Your beloved Son sustained the nails and the lance because of my sins so in His sufferings You are satisfied and I live. St. Charbel (from the chaplet)

This is such a beautiful prayer.

Kathryn Stockett’s The Help reminds me of a first love

2011-08-12T19:32:00.000-07:00

A recent trip to the movie theater landed me in a center seat with a view of a movie titled “The Help.” A good story touches a nerve, the heart or intellect. Sometimes it hits all three. For many of us in Jackson, Mississippi there is a different side to this story. Some of us grew up in South Jackson. The Help is based on what was happening in some places in North Jackson. It is safe to say everyone in North Jackson wasn’t rich. However, if you were raised in South Jackson odds are both of your parents worked, and this is the reason they hired a maid.

After I was born, my mother was one of those women who went to work. The lady who came to clean house and care for me and my brothers was named Annie Mae. It’s been so long ago, I’m not sure if her name was spelled May or Mae. Of course I was a preschooler, so that was beyond my scope. What wasn’t beyond me was the love this woman gave. Unlike the movie, we lived in a home with one restroom. There wasn’t a guest restroom, let alone a separate one for “the help” to use. Also, I never recall Annie Mae being referred to as “the help.” She did wear a white uniform and white shoes and socks to match. I can remember her smelling like starch and tobacco. She ate dry starch, I guess maybe because her diet lacked it. My dad smoked a pipe, and he kept his favorite tobacco on his dresser. When people gave him the kind he didn’t smoke, he saved it for when he ran out of the tobacco he liked. My dad is a gentle man, and he never made a scene about it, but he still laughs about opening his spare tobacco, only to find it was gone. Annie Mae liked her tobacco!

My days with Annie Mae are memories engraved more on my heart than in my mind. She and I were often left alone because my brothers were in school. Some days we’d gather plums, her from the tree and me from the ground. She’d say, “Oh not that one, it’s not good.” The following weekend my mom would make plum jelly from the gatherings. Other days, Annie Mae and I’d sit on the front porch, and I’d make a request of her to sing Jingle Bells. In the heat of a Mississippi Summer she’d start with, “Dashing through the snow…” I’d stop her and say, “No, not that, I mean Jingle Bells.” She’d laugh and start to sing the refrain. That was the only part I could remember. Sometimes, I’d ask to go see a friend and she’d say no. I always jumped out of her lap and told her I was running away. I’d run to the end of our driveway, then I’d turn and run back into her arms. I loved her, and that short trip down the drive made me realize how much.

It never occurred to me that Annie Mae would have children other than me! The first time I saw them, I was a bit jealous. I don’t know how she got to work, but I know there were times when my mom or dad would take her home. There were also times when mom took her clothes, for her children, we’d outgrown. It was a special trip to be able to go to her house, to see where my beloved Annie Mae lived.

When my brothers were around, Annie Mae was my protector. There was the time my oldest brother chased me with a can of starch. He said, “If I spray you with this, you’ll be frozen for life.” I believed him and ran for my life! Annie Mae didn’t look up from the dishes, but she said, “You leave that child alone.” That was enough to stop him and save me from becoming a statue.

Annie Mae thought everyone was on a party line. She’d run across the street and ask our neighbor to call my mom at work. Then she’d head back to our house thinking she could pick up on our phone and listen. And when mom asked why she didn’t dust mop under the bed, she’d say she opened the windows and a big wind blew the dust up under it. Annie Mae may not of had a formal education, but she was educated in what God finds to be most important. Her lack of schooling didn't matter in my world. What mattered was Annie Mae was mine. I don’t mean that in any ownership way. I mean it in a way, where time stood still and she and I shared a simple and wonder filled life. I guess it’s indescribable, but I belonged to her too. My dad has remarked over the years, he believes my laid back attitude comes from being around her. He could be right, because she was a sweet as sugar and my days were filled with her spirit.

The color of Annie Mae’s skin wasn’t something I pondered. My own skin was dark from playing in the sun. My dad’s parents were immigrants from Lebanon, and we three children took after him. Until some neighborhood kids got mad at me and called me the “N” word, I didn’t even realize others thought she was different. We weren’t allowed to say that word in our house. My dad, as a child, had faced prejudice and ugliness from others because he was different. To this day that word makes me uncomfortable, whether coming from blacks or whites.

I don’t know when it happened, but one day Annie Mae was gone from my life. It was because I’d started school, and she probably headed to another full time job. We had some part-time maids after that. I even remember one named Mary. She was young and liked to play my Cinderella board game My parents may have told me why Annie Mae left, but I don’t remember getting to say good bye. But in the world of childhood, things are often left this way. My mother says Annie Mae is long gone from this world, and many times over the years, I’ve thought about her. Every time, I cry, and today I cried all the way home from the movie. It should have been because of the injustices displayed on the screen. The truth is though, I cried because a little girl’s heart cannot forget one of the first loves of her life. And I’m hoping my precious Annie Mae knows how much I love her now, how much I loved her then and how she influenced my life in ways she probably never imagined. One day, I hope to see her again, to hear her call my name. While basking in the smell of dry starch and sweet tobacco, I’ll climb into her lap and tell her all the things a small child didn’t know how to say…from a heart that never really wanted to say goodbye.

Looking for my Father

2011-07-04T08:43:00.000-07:00

This morning I arrived at Mass and immediately saw my dad’s truck in the parking lot. He always parks in the same place because he arrives early! He usually doesn’t attend daily Mass at the parish we share, because another parish has an earlier Mass, and he likes early.

When I walked in, I didn’t see him sitting in the same place he always sits. Our priest tries to get people to move out of their “regular” seat, and it works maybe once. After that we’re like stubborn children in the desert wandering back to our comfortable places. My dad sits in one of the back pews, and I sit to his right. But he wasn’t there. That’s not unusual because sometimes before Mass he will be in the side chapel praying in front of the Blessed Sacrament. I always stop there before Mass for a brief moment myself, but I didn’t recall seeing him there. So I started wandering around. When I’d say I’m looking for my dad, the response was, “Maybe he is in the restroom.” I chatted with a sweet couple, and they showed me a photo of their son-in-law who is serving in one of our military branches. After that I returned to the chapel to see if maybe I missed my dad. Our priest was coming out of the chapel, and I said, “I’m looking for my dad.” He looked through the glass in the cry room and said, “There is your dad. He’s sitting about five rows from the front. Can you believe it?” I said, “No wonder I couldn’t find him!”

When I reached my dad, I asked, “What are you doing here? I’ve been looking everywhere for you.” Two ladies sitting behind him were laughing. My dad chuckled too. I crawled pass him and took my place next to him.

After Mass my dad and our priest had a good laugh about this “moving” episode. On the way home, it became a reflection for me. It started by replacing the thought of my dad with the thought of God our Father. The image of our priest pointing me towards my dad became him pointing us to God. My little trip around the church looking for him became our journey towards God and those we meet along the way. However, the most important point was looking for my dad in the place I expected him to be. Unlike my dad, God doesn’t change places. But we find ourselves looking for Him sometimes in the same place or places we expect to find Him. My lesson for today is not to assume, and to keep searching. If we continually look for our Father we will see Him more. God is present in every space we occupy. So why do we look for Him to only be in the same place in our lives and hearts? And most of all, why are we surprised to find Him in the places we least expect?

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Lord, we pray you will open our eyes and hearts to you, no matter where we find ourselves! Amen

Conversion / Reversion Stories

2011-05-05T16:31:00.001-07:00

http://www.facebook.com/catholicconverts

If you enjoy Catholic conversion and reversion stories check out this facebook page!

Japan’s state before the earthquake, tsunami and nuclear power problem

2011-03-27T13:01:00.000-07:00

In the February 24, 2011 issue of The Wanderer a column appears titled, Japan: Leading the way to extinction. The article, written before the devastation, is by Brian Clowes (Dr. Clowes is research manager for Human Life International, www.hli.org). Dr. Clowes would not be aware that the numbers he quoted would change in a short amount of time. He writes, “According to the United Nations, there are 1,170 fewer Japanese in the world today than there were yesterday. By the end of this year, there will be a third of a million less, and by the year 2050, Japan will have lost nearly a third of its population.”

The reason for the decline in population is due to practically no emigration or immigration and most significant, many Japanese women are opting out of motherhood. Also Japan legalized abortion in 1949 and has suffered 40 million losses from this alone. In essence what occurs is the population stabilizes then declines. By discouraging immigration, choosing abortion, contraception, and sterilization, Japan is losing a required workforce to maintain productivity. The fallout is a nation turned on its head. Now the elderly population is top heavy and the support at the bottom has decreased leaving little support for the retired.

Dr. Clowes further points out the occurrence of a strange phenomena known as the hikikomori, or voluntary long term shut-ins, and the soushoke danshi “grass-eating boys” named this because of their lack of interest in human relationships. Contrary to what most of us believe these people are living quiet lives outside of competition. This hopeless state is backed up by a suicide rate unrivaled by any other developed nation. “More than half a million Japanese have murdered themselves since 1995.” On top of that euthanasia was approved in 2007. And a sad commentary to go along with the above is the market has shifted from the young to the old. This market includes companion dolls. The Tomy’s baby dolls are for women who never married or had children. Dr. Clowes says, “…some of these women actually believe the doll is their own flesh and blood.”

Near the end of the article we read a warning for the world, “…our population control cartel continues to abort, sterilize, and contracept the people of the world as fast as they can.” And, “The world’s total fertility rate will hit replacement in just three years. Its population will peak in only three decades and then began to decline.”

It is evident our prayers for Japan should not only reflect their needs caused by the affects of natural devastation.

"Man’s life comes from God: it is his image and imprint, as sharing in his breath of life.
God therefore is the sole Lord of this life: Man cannot do with it as he wills."
Evangelium Vitae-Gospel of Life-Pope John Paul II-1995

Lessons learned when facebook turns ugly

2011-01-15T12:36:00.000-08:00

Recently a friend of mine posted a photo she saw on her home health route. She is a therapist, working in a rural area. She often does this, and the last photo she posted, before the one that cause a stir on facebook, was a calf being born. The photo in dispute was a clothesline filled with several bras, ladies’ panties and two nightgowns. She wrote something like, “the things you see in home health.” Most people remarked about frozen underwear (it has been cold here) or said she was at their house, etc… No person, with the exception of one, pointed to the fact that the owner of the underwear could be poor with no other option. The fact he pointed this out was not a problem, but how he chose to point it out didn’t set well with others. He attacked my friend, saying she was OUT OF TOUCH among other things. He used a lot of caps, indicating screaming. Feeling the need to defend my friend, I responded that she was not OUT OF TOUCH and unknown to most, often provided material needs for her patients because they could not afford such items. This included not only medical equipment but food too. I used the phrase, “…she often eases their poverty.” I also stated many women hang their unmentionables to dry because the dryer takes a toll on the life and use of the elastic and delicate material. Keep in mind only delicate items were hanging on the line. The guy then turned on me saying I was probably wrong, and I should be ashamed of using the phrase “…eases their poverty.” He added …not to talk to him about poverty unless I had the basis to do so. I asked my friend if this guy grew up poor or was impoverished, and she said as far as she knew, quite the opposite. Because I’ve had a rough patch in my life I responded, “Family and friends helped me years ago when I needed it. They EASED my life in many ways. They have nothing to be ashamed of….so I don’t understand what you are saying.” After that I wrote to my friend, I knew she didn’t mean harm and others knew it too. I further stated the problem with the written word is, sometimes people interpret it with different meanings. My friend posted the people had a nice house and car. She said, for all she knew they were better off than she is herself.

Long story short…he “unfriended” her, but still sent some strong emails her way. Needless to say, I was pretty put out, because I’ve known my friend for over 30 years. I felt he was unfair in judging her. It took some prayer to get me back on track. So today, after mulling it over, I realize this ended up being a positive. It reminded me of that time in my life when things weren’t so great. I wasn’t going to go hungry, because my family wouldn’t let that happen, but I wasn’t a stranger to creditors calling requesting their money. It took awhile to dig out of that hole, but along the way people helped ease my burden. Some made sure my children made it safely to school, because I had to be at work early in the morning. My parents bought me a washer and dryer, plus put a new roof on my house. That’s just the tip of the iceberg for all they’ve done. Guys I worked with, moved sand to my yard to help the grass grow, plus one repaired all the wood trim outside my house. They came when I locked my keys in my car and looked at any problems I had with it too. My neighbor and his son fixed my broken down lawn mower. His wife took care of my children when I couldn't be home, because an emergency occurred. The list goes on and on. So today I’ve found myself reflecting on those who have helped me along the way. I can never express how thankful I am for their love and friendship or how much they mean to me. I do pray that God will bless them richly and keep them safe.

Furthermore, "poverty" is not a word to associate with shame. It is often defined as “a lack of need.” This can be material or spiritual. At times in life when I am spiritually impoverished, family and friends step forward to lift me up. Complete strangers have done the same. Mother Teresa often remarked that the wealthiest people may actually be the poorest. There is so much truth in this, because those who lack the material see what is really important. It is not the number of shoes I have in my closet, but it is how I relate to those in my life and those I meet along the way.

So from this unpleasant encounter, thanksgiving and beauty has thrived. What shame is there in easing someone’s poverty? After all of these years, I recognize those who helped me, simply reflected the light of Christ. May I learn from their example, as they have learned from His.

I've been gone too long...Merry Christmas!

2010-12-24T19:30:00.000-08:00

I've been away from this blog so long, I forgot my login! Thankfully, I found where I did write it down.

We've been blessed with our first grandchild and between keeping him a couple a days a week and other writing...well it's been a bit wild.

Here this Christmas Eve I have a quiet moment to pray you all have a blessed Christmas and a New Year filled with God's love.

As the years pass along, it's easier to see His love working and moving in so many ways. He is always there, sometimes we just fail to see Him.

So peeking into the manger we find, in the crib sleeping, the sweetest babe...the Savior of the world. Where do you find Him resting this Holy Season, and have you joined Him for awhile? It's not too late!

For the newly engaged, newly married, still married and everybody else too!

2010-10-27T14:06:00.000-07:00

Today, I stopped by a business I frequent from time to time. The two ladies who own and run the place often stop and chat with me. One was leaving, but the other asked me if I knew her husband had died recently. She told me how he’d suffered over the years; she spoke briefly about their life and about his last days. We even found out her late husband and my husband retired from the same police department.

This lady told me an older woman came in one day and told her, “At least your husband died loving you.” The older woman’s husband had left her years ago for another woman. Obviously it still hurt after all these years. When I heard that I told the lady who’d recently lost her husband how true the fact of having a loving marriage through it all was special. I told her one thing my own husband has taught me, through his actions and words, was to say “Thank you.” I have to say his example, even after twelve years, has opened my eyes to the need of sharing appreciation. She smiled and said her husband did the same thing. She said he told her thank you, and he said it often. I left with thankfulness again for the husband God has sent me.

When my husband and I married, our priest said sometimes the three most important words aren’t always, “I love you.” Sometimes the most important words are, “I need you.” We can be independent men or independent women, and sometimes it is hard to voice our needs. It can be difficult to share a new life with someone or old life for that matter. The key word is “share.” However, the key is to acknowledge the need for each other and to say those words of, “thank you.”

On the way home, I started to think about how this relates to Jesus as the Groom and the Church as His Bride. We know our need for Him and why we should continually be thankful. The question is how does Jesus need us? The answer is He doesn’t, but in love He gives us the ability to be needed by Him. He needs our hands, our feet, and our witness to His heart. He has shown His appreciation for us by sacrificing Himself and opening the door to eternal life with Him.

Like the groom for his bride, Jesus’ desire is for our gaze and heart to belong to Him alone. God has the ability to do whatever He chooses, but He gave us free will. Why would He do this? Maybe because He knows a forced love is not true. He could force us to love Him, and we would truly love Him, but it wouldn’t be freely given. By giving us free will, He knows when we come to Him through a relationship of discovery we will find we love Him the Creator of love. Though we may come through much pain, worry, sorrow and life’s troubles, we acknowledge the blessings of joy, friendship and love. No matter our lot in life we have reason to be thankful. The one physically wounded may still be thankful for a whole mind and spirit. The one spiritually wounded may still be thankful for a whole physical life….and the list goes on.

We finally arrive at a thankfulness of not only how God has fulfilled our needs, but even at times our wants. He delights in giving us the desires of our heart even unto the death of His Son. We stand before Him and say, “O Lord how we love you. We love you for being there through it all. We love you for not holding back even a small bit of yourself. We love you for teaching us the meaning of life, even though sometimes it hurt. We love you because you’ve shown us how to love. We are thankful for all you have given to us. We thank you for every breath we’ve ever taken, especially for the one of life you breathed into us. Lord we can never thank you and love you enough.” I envision His response to be one where He stands with open arms and says, “My love has forever existed for you, and my Heart has only ached for your love in return.” His wounds eternally present remind me how He has loved us and does love us. The Lamb slaughtered by our sinfulness bears the marks of a pure One willing to take on what He didn’t deserve. He knows His Bride is not spotless but He makes Her perfect. He presents us to His Father who sees us through eyes of pure love. Jesus not only does this because He loves us, but because He knows we need Him. This is where we should find the vision of love…unselfish and true love.

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Father, we thank you and love you for loving us into existence. Jesus, we thank you and love you for loving us to your death. Holy Spirit we thank you and love you for bringing the fire of your love to us.

We believe Lord, help our unbelief. Amen

Sanctity of Life

2010-08-26T07:30:00.000-07:00

‎" While still in the womb of Mary - Jesus brought peace to John the Baptist who leapt for joy in the womb of Elizabeth. The unborn was the first one to proclaim the coming of Christ." Blessed Mother Teresa

Pray for the unborn, pray for the women and men wounded by abortion.

Prayer Quote

2010-08-22T11:50:00.000-07:00

Virtues are formed by prayer. Prayer preserves temperance. Prayer suppresses anger. Prayer prevents emotions of pride and envy. Prayer draws into the soul the Holy Spirit, and raises man to Heaven. -- St. Ephraem

If we could only stop to pray before our emotions gain control of our mouth and action!

The last line is a beautiful illustration of prayer bringing God to earth and His Spirit, through this prayer, lifting us to Heaven. Here we find a Father who only wishes to embrace His children, to comfort and love.

United to suffer

2010-07-15T16:25:00.000-07:00

“You must be joined together in a close union of mind and heart, which is stronger and far more formidable to the world and to hell than are the armed forces of a great nation to its enemies. Evil spirits are united to destroy you; you must be united to crush them. The avaricious are united to make money and amass gold... and silver; you must combine your efforts to acquire the eternal treasures hidden in the Cross. Pleasure-seekers unite to enjoy themselves; you must be united to suffer.” ~ St. Louis de Montfort

Quote about our Lord's Baptism

2010-07-12T11:40:00.000-07:00

The Lord was Baptized, not to be cleansed Himself, but to cleanse the waters, so that those waters, cleansed by the flesh of Christ which knew no sin, might have the power of Baptism.

~St. Ambrose of Milan

I've never seen this quote, but I think it is so beautiful and quite profound.

Vessels of God's compassionate love for others

2010-07-10T16:43:00.000-07:00

"We become what we love and who we love shapes what we become. If we love things, we become a thing. If we love nothing, we become nothing. Imitation is not a literal mimicking of Christ, rather it means becoming the image of the beloved, an image disclosed through transformation. This means we are to become vessels of God´s compassionate love for others. "

~ St. Clare of Assisi

May we pray for each other?

2010-07-07T18:15:00.000-07:00

I am finding it difficult to blog and write a column for examiner.com, so I've decided to make this blog mostly one of prayer. Every now and then, there may be a thought or quote thrown in.

I've prayed about this because I've thought about shutting the blog down. I pray for my readers, past, present and future, so the thought came to me, to ask what your needs are. I'm asking each of you to respond to the requests you see here with prayer too. In a sense we will all be praying for each other. For now, I'm making this post a general prayer request post. Later, maybe we can categorize special needs. If you need a prayer partner, please leave a comment with your prayer request. You don't have to leave your name or name people. God knows who we are all!

I'll start with a prayer intention.

God, our Father, please give peace and understanding to all who read these words. Give them eyes of faith, a heart of hope and the reality of Your love. Shower them with your grace, and keep your angels around them. Watch over those they love. Also Father, please grant special graces to those who have nobody to pray for them. Lead them in Your Spirit and light to their place in Your Kingdom through Jesus' most Sacred Heart. Amen

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PLEASE REMEMBER I have comment moderation, so people who write ugly things won't be published. So far, it's been in Chinese only (the ugly comments), but that's why I have it. If your post takes awhile to show up, that is why.

Such love cannot exist without the Spirit of God

2010-06-22T08:28:00.000-07:00

My brothers and sisters, question your heart, and if you cannot find
love of neighbor there set your mind at ease. Such love cannot exist
without the Spirit of God. Paul the Apostle bears witness to this: "The
love of God has been poured out in our hearts through the Holy Spirit
who has been given to us."
...
St. Augustine
-- Sermon on 1 John 6, 10

This was posted on facebook today. When I read this, I thought about this truth. We are taught to try and see others through God's eyes. Even though on an intellectual level I've understood this for years, I haven't applied it.

Our prayer should be: Lord, help me to see others through your Heart...The Heart of a love like no other. Remind me to turn to you for the illumination of the Holy Spirit. For if the love in my heart is smoldering, the charity of your Heart is exploding, and your Holiness is the fire that lights up the world. Thank you for looking beyond our puny hearts and toward what you desire for us. We love you and ask you to help us love you more. In loving you Lord, we find the ease to love others because of you! Amen

Sacred Heart Prayer

2010-06-10T18:15:00.000-07:00

0 Sacred Heart of Jesus, I Place My Trust in Thee

Sacred Heart of Jesus, I place my trust in Thee,
Whatever may befall me, Lord, though dark the hour may be;
In all my woes, in all my joys, though nought but grief I see,
O Sacred Heart of Jesus, I place my trust in Thee.

When those I loved have passed away, and I am sore distressed,
0 Sacred Heart of Jesus, I fly to Thee for rest.
In all my trials, great or small, my confidence shall be
Unshaken as I cry, dear Lord, I place my trust in Thee.

This is my one sweet prayer, dear Lord, my faith, my trust, my love,
But most of all in that last hour, when death points up above,
O sweet Savior, may Thy face smile on my soul all free.
Oh may I cry with rapturous love, I've placed my trust inThee.

Heart's Ponder

2010-05-24T13:41:00.000-07:00

"True virtue has no limits, but goes on and on, and especially holy charity, which is the virtue of virtues, and which having a definite object, would become infinite if it could meet with a heart capable of infinity." -St. Francis de Sales

How beautiful is this quote? ...if it could meet with a heart capable of infinity!

What does this say to you?

The USA Chaplet NEW

2010-05-04T10:00:00.000-07:00

For those who do not know, a chaplet is in the form of a traditional rosary but doesn’t have quite as many beads. Like the rosary it is used for prayer and reflection. There are many chaplets, but the new one covered in this post is called the USA Chaplet.

The dear lady who prayed about and brought us this new chaplet is named Mary. She has the Nihil Obstat from her local bishop, and this devotion is now available for the faithful. The USA Chaplet is a much needed prayer for our country. For decades we’ve seen our society sinking due to decaying morals.

The USA Chaplet consists of a Trinity Crucifix, Scapular center piece, 30 beads and is in the colors of the USA which also reflects the Father, Son, Holy Spirit and Our Lady. Each group includes the Trinity and Our Lady, hence the 4 beads. The Pater's are in a deeper Royal blue because God is the King of the universe.

On the Crucifix we pray The Creed
1st bead from Crucifix pray the Our Father (clear/white - The Father's Love & Mercy)
2nd bead from Crucifix pray the Fatima prayer (red - Precious Blood of Jesus)
3rd bead from Crucifix pray the Glory be (clear/white - The Spirit's Guidance & Power)
4th bead from Crucifix pray the Hail Mary (light blue - for Mary & obedience)
5th bead from Crucifix pray for Help for the most vulnerable as follows:
"Merciful Lord, please protect and save the most vulnerable; the unborn, disabled, sick, elderly and those that know not Your Love and Mercy."

The Creed – Pray on the Crucifix

Our Father/Lord's Prayer/Pater – 1st bead
[Matthew 6:9-13 and Luke 11:2-4]

Our Father, Who art in heaven Hallowed be Thy Name. Thy kingdom come, Thy will be done, on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread, and forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us; and lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil. Amen

Fatima Prayer – 2nd bead
Oh my Jesus, forgive us our sins, save us from the fires of hell ... lead all souls to heaven, especially those in most need of Your Mercy. Amen

Glory be – 3rd bead
Glory be to the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit as it was in the beginning, is now and ever shall be world without end. Amen

Hail Mary/Ave – 4th bead
[Luke 1:28-35, 42-48]

Hail Mary full of grace, the Lord is with thee, Blessed are thou among women and blessed is the Fruit of thy womb, Jesus. Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners now and at the hour of our death. Amen

Then pray 5 groups of 4 beads preceded by a Pater:

On the chain before the Pater's: Pray,"Most loving Father, may Your Will be done on earth as it is in heaven."

On the Pater's: Pray, "Sweetest Jesus, for the sake of those that love You, by merit of Your Holy Passion, lift not Your Protective Hand from us and please bless the USA!"

On the Ave's: Pray, "Eternal God, united to the Perfect & Holy Passion of Jesus, we offer You our joys, sorrows, breaths, heartbeats and tears to strengthen the faithful, renew the lukewarm, restore the fallen away and convert the proud."

In Conclusion: Pray, "Merciful Father, whose tender Love has no bounds, grant, in Your Goodness and Mercy that we always embrace Your Perfect Will in all things with a joyful heart. Please cover us with the Precious Blood of Jesus in which we trust and rely. Send the Holy Spirit to renew our souls and our land that it may bring You honor and glory and we may, once again, be a nation under God! Bring us daily closer to the Sacred & Immaculate Hearts and increase our Faith that we may always strengthen each other, in Jesus' Name. Amen."

Click here to order your USA Chaplet

Is the meaning behind the Sign of the Cross prayerful or ritual without reality?

2010-04-05T12:47:00.000-07:00

An Orthodox friend likes to tease me about Catholics "making" the Sign of The Cross backwards. Instead of going to the left shoulder then right, the Orthodox go from right to left. Because my Catholic rite is Maronite, I know Eastern Catholics also go from right to left. It is a difference in customs between the Western and Eastern Churches. So being with my Orthodox friend should feel a bit like home to me.

Some Christian faiths think making this sign is "ritual without reality." People should be mindful of why they are making this sign, but people should be mindful with all prayer. One of the Early Church Fathers, Tertullian (160-220 A.D.) remarked "In all our travels and movements, in all our coming in and going out…at the table, in lighting our candles, in lying down, in sitting down,…we mark our foreheads with the sign of the cross." Originally it is believed the cross was made with the thumb on the forehead only, as still used today during Ash Wednesday. Eventually the cross moved from just the forehead to a motion from the forehead to the chest or stomach and each shoulder. The Orthodox press the ring and pinky finger to their palm and their thumb touches the remaining index and middle fingers' tip. The two fingers on the palm represent the Incarnation. The other three fingers symbolize the Trinity. Most Latin rite Catholics make the sign with all five fingers open, signifying the five wounds of Christ. Either way is fine and both are beautiful and mindful of Our Lord.

Converts to the Church often ask why we make a small cross on our forehead, our lips and our chest before the Gospel. When the Gospel is about to be proclaimed, we make the sign on the forehead so we will keep the Word in our thoughts, next on our lips, reminding us to speak the Word in truth and finally on our chest, storing the Word of God in our hearts.

Is this ritual without reality? Absolutely not, it is the reality of a prayerful communion with the Trinity. When this sign is performed with holy water it is a renewal of our Baptismal promise. The Sign of the Cross is a remembrance of the love of Christ, His sacrifice for all mankind and His awesome gift of eternal life.

A Crow arrives at the Tenth Station of the Cross

2010-04-02T12:37:00.000-07:00

Before I tell you this quick story, I want to make it clear I do not believe crows are evil. My married name means "keeper of the raven," and these are creatures of God. I find the blue-black winged birds to be rather beautiful. Now on to the story.

Today at church, we were listening to a meditation on the Stations of the Cross. We were reflecting on the tenth station where Jesus is mocked and stripped. As the narrator was reading about the mocking, a crow appeared at the window in front of us. He strutted and stopped to crow several times. Of course it sounded like, "caw." He continued to do this through the tenth station. At the end of this station he flew to a nearby branch. While we contemplated the eleventh station of Christ being crucified, he flitted around on this branch but didn't make a sound. The twelfth station arrived and we focused on the death of Christ. At the end of this station he flew away.

I thought it was an interesting event in light of what we were doing. This crow proposed an analogy of ~ could this be a mocking of Christ or a mocking of those persecuting Him? It could go either way. Do we speak against others, or do we speak up for them? Do we deny them compassion or do we love them as they are?

Easter is a time of reflection. Who knew that reflection would actually come through the window in the form of a crow?!

A Blessed and Happy Easter to all!

WOW WOW WOW Christians and Muslims celebrate the Annuciation together

2010-03-25T17:43:00.000-07:00

Good news for a change! Click on good news to read about the holiday celebrated by Christians and Muslims.

Great Prayer Need

2010-03-18T10:59:00.000-07:00

I am directing you to another blog by Da Mihi Animas.
Click here to read about the Senate Health Bill including taxpayer funding of abortion.

Some Early Church Fathers' teachings on the Sacrament of Reconciliation ~ Confession

2010-03-16T07:36:00.000-07:00

Ignatius of Antioch

"For as many as are of God and of Jesus Christ are also with the bishop. And as many as shall, in the exercise of penance, return into the unity of the Church, these, too, shall belong to God, that they may live according to Jesus Christ" (Letter to the Philadelphians 3 [A.D. 110]).

"For where there is division and wrath, God does not dwell. To all them that repent, the Lord grants forgiveness, if they turn in penitence to the unity of God, and to communion with the bishop" (ibid., 8).

Irenaeus

"[The Gnostic disciples of Marcus] have deluded many women. . . . Their consciences have been branded as with a hot iron. Some of these women make a public confession, but others are ashamed to do this, and in silence, as if withdrawing from themselves the hope of the life of God, they either apostatize entirely or hesitate between the two courses" (Against Heresies 1:22 [A.D. 189]).

Tertullian

"[Regarding confession, some] flee from this work as being an exposure of themselves, or they put it off from day to day. I presume they are more mindful of modesty than of salvation, like those who contract a disease in the more shameful parts of the body and shun making themselves known to the physicians; and thus they perish along with their own bashfulness" (Repentance 10:1 [A.D. 203]).

Hippolytus

"[The bishop conducting the ordination of the new bishop shall pray:] God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. . . . Pour forth now that power which comes from you, from your royal Spirit, which you gave to your beloved Son, Jesus Christ, and which he bestowed upon his holy apostles . . . and grant this your servant, whom you have chosen for the episcopate, [the power] to feed your holy flock and to serve without blame as your high priest, ministering night and day to propitiate unceasingly before your face and to offer to you the gifts of your holy Church, and by the Spirit of the high priesthood to have the authority to forgive sins, in accord with your command" (Apostolic Tradition 3 [A.D. 215]).

Cyprian of Carthage

"The apostle [Paul] likewise bears witness and says: ‘ . . . Whoever eats the bread or drinks the cup of the Lord unworthily will be guilty of the body and blood of the Lord’ [1 Cor. 11:27]. But [the impenitent] spurn and despise all these warnings; before their sins are expiated, before they have made a confession of their crime, before their conscience has been purged in the ceremony and at the hand of the priest . . . they do violence to [the Lord’s] body and blood, and with their hands and mouth they sin against the Lord more than when they denied him" (The Lapsed 15:1–3 (A.D. 251]).

"Of how much greater faith and salutary fear are they who . . . confess their sins to the priests of God in a straightforward manner and in sorrow, making an open declaration of conscience. . . . I beseech you, brethren, let everyone who has sinned confess his sin while he is still in this world, while his confession is still admissible, while the satisfaction and remission made through the priests are still pleasing before the Lord" (ibid., 28).

"[S]inners may do penance for a set time, and according to the rules of discipline come to public confession, and by imposition of the hand of the bishop and clergy receive the right of Communion. [But now some] with their time [of penance] still unfulfilled . . . they are admitted to Communion, and their name is presented; and while the penitence is not yet performed, confession is not yet made, the hands of the bishop and clergy are not yet laid upon them, the Eucharist is given to them; although it is written, ‘Whosoever shall eat the bread and drink the cup of the Lord unworthily, shall be guilty of the body and blood of the Lord’ [1 Cor. 11:27]" (Letters 9:2 [A.D. 253]).

"And do not think, dearest brother, that either the courage of the brethren will be lessened, or that martyrdoms will fail for this cause, that penance is relaxed to the lapsed, and that the hope of peace [i.e., absolution] is offered to the penitent. . . . For to adulterers even a time of repentance is granted by us, and peace is given" (ibid., 51[55]:20).

"But I wonder that some are so obstinate as to think that repentance is not to be granted to the lapsed, or to suppose that pardon is to be denied to the penitent, when it is written, ‘Remember whence thou art fallen, and repent, and do the first works’ [Rev. 2:5], which certainly is said to him who evidently has fallen, and whom the Lord exhorts to rise up again by his deeds [of penance], because it is written, ‘Alms deliver from death’ [Tob. 12:9]" (ibid., 51[55]:22).

Basil the Great

"It is necessary to confess our sins to those to whom the dispensation of God’s mysteries is entrusted. Those doing penance of old are found to have done it before the saints. It is written in the Gospel that they confessed their sins to John the Baptist [Matt. 3:6], but in Acts [19:18] they confessed to the apostles" (Rules Briefly Treated 288 [A.D. 374]).

John Chrysostom

"Priests have received a power which God has given neither to angels nor to archangels. It was said to them: ‘Whatsoever you shall bind on earth shall be bound in heaven; and whatsoever you shall loose, shall be loosed.’ Temporal rulers have indeed the power of binding; but they can only bind the body. Priests, in contrast, can bind with a bond which pertains to the soul itself and transcends the very heavens. Did [God] not give them all the powers of heaven? ‘Whose sins you shall forgive,’ he says, ‘they are forgiven them; whose sins you shall retain, they are retained.’ What greater power is there than this? The Father has given all judgment to the Son. And now I see the Son placing all this power in the hands of men [Matt. 10:40; John 20:21–23]. They are raised to this dignity as if they were already gathered up to heaven" (The Priesthood 3:5 [A.D. 387]).

Ambrose of Milan

"For those to whom [the right of binding and loosing] has been given, it is plain that either both are allowed, or it is clear that neither is allowed. Both are allowed to the Church, neither is allowed to heresy. For this right has been granted to priests only" (Penance 1:1 [A.D. 388]).

Jerome

"If the serpent, the devil, bites someone secretly, he infects that person with the venom of sin. And if the one who has been bitten keeps silence and does not do penance, and does not want to confess his wound . . . then his brother and his master, who have the word [of absolution] that will cure him, cannot very well assist him" (Commentary on Ecclesiastes 10:11 [A.D. 388]).

Augustine

"When you shall have been baptized, keep to a good life in the commandments of God so that you may preserve your baptism to the very end. I do not tell you that you will live here without sin, but they are venial sins which this life is never without. Baptism was instituted for all sins. For light sins, without which we cannot live, prayer was instituted. . . . But do not commit those sins on account of which you would have to be separated from the body of Christ. Perish the thought! For those whom you see doing penance have committed crimes, either adultery or some other enormities. That is why they are doing penance. If their sins were light, daily prayer would suffice to blot them out. . . . In the Church, therefore, there are three ways in which sins are forgiven: in baptisms, in prayer, and in the greater humility of penance" (Sermon to Catechumens on the Creed 7:15, 8:16 [A.D. 395]).

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Click here for my latest examiner article on the Sacrament of Reconciliation!

Time Change is a Good Time to Change

2010-03-13T13:58:00.000-08:00

For this part of the country and many others, we will experience "spring forward" this evening or in the morning. As much as I wish we didn't go through this every Fall and Spring, I guess it is a good time for reflection.

Throw me in the pile with everyone else who doesn't like change! The reason, I suspect, is because there is security in staying the same. We know what to expect in our little world. However, nothing stays the same. Eventually we grow older, our circle of friends may change or grow, our families change, and our view of life changes. The reflection in the mirror may change, our understanding of God's love may change, but He remains the same. Maybe the lesson He is trying to teach, is even if our changing world causes the seas of our life to be choppy or calm, He is our stability. He is our security, our anchor, and our light. If we keep our eyes on Him, the time of our life ~ will be an eternity spent in heaven!

Lord, help me to accept the inevitable changes in life. Help me to make good use of the time you've given me, and help me to relish that time ~ with those I share it with! Amen

Stay with me, Lord ~ St. Padre Pio

2010-03-09T12:50:00.000-08:00

Stay with me, Lord, for You are my light, and without You I am in darkness.

Saint Padre Pio of Pietrelcina

When I was a small child, I was afraid of the dark. A night light stayed on all night, but my mother stayed with me every night, until I fell asleep. If I waked up, and she wasn’t there, I’d call for her. It’s funny how things change. Now I cannot stand any light when trying to sleep at night.

My previous posts on Padre Pio’s prayer touched on the first three lines. Each begins with, Stay with me, Lord... This fourth line seems so simple, but like so many times we find the profound in the simple.

How odd it seems to ask Our Lord to stay with us. It is us that walk away. For me, these four words mean don’t let me stray from You, and I want to add EVER!!! Because when I turn away from Him for even just a second, I’m headed in the wrong direction. And no matter how bright the day, I’m blind. I am blind even in good actions. My motive has to be questioned.

How many times during the day do I turn from Him? I don’t want know the answer. I just want to know that like the single flame of a candle in the night, He will be there when I’m in darkness, and He will answer when I call.

Missing when missing daily Mass

2010-03-05T13:58:00.001-08:00

This week, I made it to Mass three times. That's up from one time last week. Well technically I guess it was two times this week, because today was a Communion service. Anyway, missing this special time with Our Lord may or may not show up to others, but I can certainly feel it.

Today I was asked to do the readings, and the reading on Joseph and his brothers seemed appropriate! How much he must have missed his family, especially his father. We know the story of how he was sold into slavery and eventually was the reason his family survived famine. This is another example of God taking something really bad and turning it into something really good! But Joseph's heart had to be heavy as he longed for his father.

The separation is what stands out to me today. When I'm away, the day seems so different. It may not be something I can put my finger on, but it is a feeling of having missed out on what is the best part of my day.

Unlike Joseph, we don't have to wait years to be with God our Father, but it's not like that for everyone. In some parts of the world people are not free to attend Mass, and others don't have Our Lord in the Eucharist.

Eucharist is thanksgiving, and I don't want to miss out on the opportunity to participate. More importantly, I don't want to miss out on Communion with Our Lord. And I suspect that "something missing" is a heart longing for the Love of it's life, a longing sometimes hard to define. It's a longing only He can calm with a love only He can give!

Lord, thank you for being the Lamb of God. Thank you for loving us, and thank you for calling us. Amen!

Quilting and love!

2010-03-01T13:57:00.000-08:00

The photo of the quilt on this blog was made for me by Mrs. LaNelle Renfroe Johnson.

I met LaNelle through facebook. We found out she and my mother worked together many years ago at a department store called Kenningtons. Then imagine my surprise when I found out, that many years ago, she lived near my mother-in-law and had visited her not that long before our meeting.

Though I've never met LaNelle in person (she lives on the west coast, and I in the south), I have learned a valuable lesson of the love of God from her. She told me each stitch was stitched with love. Isn't that something? Here she sends me a blanket to wrap around myself, and in doing so, her love wraps around me. It's like getting a hug from her. She's shown me God reaches out to us from places we've never dreamed of!

Through these months, I've learned a lot about LaNelle. She's shared stories of her life, photos and stories of her family and friends. I can tell she is enthusiastic about life and loved by many. I am so blessed to be in that crowd.

Dear Lord, thank you for all the friends you send our way. Thank you for LaNelle, and please keep her and her family safe in your Heart! And when her quilt wraps those through the coming years, help us remember the warmth of your love too! Amen

THANK YOU LANELLE!!!

Telling God about our Wants and Needs

2010-02-23T07:44:00.000-08:00

One of my recent readings, was about laying all our desires in front of God. We don't ever have to make an appointment with Him, but it doesn't hurt to picture ourselves putting our business or life plan on His desk. Keep in mind, God is the ultimate boss! He knows what is going on, and He will work things out. Why then do we have to even tell or ask? All prayer is a communion with Our Lord, and sometimes we have to ask and tell because we don't have a clear understanding of what we want and need in our lives. It is an opportunity for God to communicate our true desire because He truly knows us better than we know ourselves.

Sometimes when I look back over my life, I am thankful God didn't give me what I was asking for at the time. And even though waiting is still difficult, it is easier knowing that waiting on His will is best for me. It comes down to a matter of trust...trusting Him to lead us through this journey.

Dearest Lord, thank you for watching my steps and keeping me from paths not meant for me. Help me to remember some wants may not be good for me. Help me to remember my true needs are in your hands. Help me to remember your will is the best design for my life and the awesome manifestation of your Glory! Amen

Washing Away Guilt

2010-02-17T16:22:00.000-08:00

Our Responsorial Psalm today was from Psalm 51.

Have mercy on me, O God, in your goodness;
in the greatness of your compassion wipe out my offense.
Thoroughly wash me from my guilt
and of my sin cleanse me.

I was reading this again this evening, and that part of ... Thoroughly wash me from my guilt...struck me. Often after we are cleansed of our sins, we still carry the guilt. Don't we carry guilt over things that aren't even caused by our sins? An example would be as a parent, I experience guilt over something concerning my child. I feel guilty, like maybe I am not a good parent, and I have failed in this aspect. I found it interesting the next part was ...and of my sin cleanse me. Sometimes the sin is not believing God truly forgives us, so we hold on to the guilt. The guilt of the sin itself and the guilt of how it affected others. Am I rambling here? :)

I've always believed that even a sin done in the dark is like a rock thrown into water. The ripple effect spreads out and affects the Universe in ways we cannot imagine. The Body of Christ is wounded by sin. So my prayer is this ~ Dearest Lord, my sins wound your Body. Help me to see that when I seek forgiveness for my sins, I am helping not only myself to heal but also contributing to the healing of the Body of Christ. Amen

Hello

2010-02-15T16:02:00.000-08:00

Hi fellow bloggers and readers. I've been a lazy blogger lately. Maybe I should start a blog titled The Lazy Blogger. I'm sure someone has already done it! One of the reasons I'm having a difficult time is I am experiencing some blurry vision, sometimes in my left eye, sometimes in my right. The eye doctor didn't see anything out of order, so I'm headed to my General Practice doctor late in March. It was the earliest I could get an appointment. The blurriness is not present everyday. Anyway, God willing, we'll get to the root of the problem here soon! I hope you are all doing well, and you are always in my prayers. God bless you all, Margaret

Prayer and Art ~ Again

2010-01-24T13:36:00.000-08:00

My last post was on the Baby Jesus icon and one man's prayer through this painting. Mr. Fowler allowed me to take the icon to my home for awhile. He's done this with other people from time to time, and he asks each person or family to sign the back before returning the icon to him. Since that time, I've looked and looked for a Baby Jesus icon to no avail.

During the time the icon was in my home, I think I just enjoyed reflecting on the Christ Child. How amazing it is that the God of Eternity, came to live and be with us. He humbled Himself, so that by His example we could all have eternal life. I often think of the many ways He revealed Himself to mankind before the Nativity. A humorous thought pops into my mind. I picture Him saying, "well they still don't get it. I'm going to have to go and show them myself."

One thing I found for sure, is when praying through art each individual sees something different. Take the cord around the scroll Jesus is holding. There are seven cords wrapped around the scroll. Mr. Fowler said, "The scroll in his left hand is wrapped seven times with a string. This I feel is the need to read and follow the Scriptures daily in our lives." How interesting. Seven days make a week and he saw daily studying and following of Scripture. I also thought of the seven, but I thought of seven as the number of the Old Testament covenant. The creation story of seven days, the seven Sacraments of the Church. (Sacrament is Latin for covenant or oath). Jesus pours out grace on us through these Sacraments. The Sacraments are not something we do for or to God, but powerful avenues of His grace. These physical signs point us toward the spiritual, infusing us with the love and guidance of Our Heavenly Family.

As of lately, I am realizing, my existence is not what I can do for God. My reason for being is what can God do through me? He can do all things, if I lay aside self and become the channel of His desire.

Blessed Trinity, through the precious heart of the Christ Child, help us to remember to be still and recognize when you are working through us. Help us to lay aside the obstacles we place in your way, and help us to be loving examples of you! Amen

Prayer and Art ~ One Man's View of the Baby Jesus Icon

2010-01-14T12:10:00.000-08:00

As I gaze upon the original icon of the Child Jesus, I am drawn to several reflections. The first is from Sister M. Helen Weiser, OSC. She states, “The profound beauty of an icon is gentle. It does not force its way, it does not intrude. It asks for patience without the uneasiness of early acquaintance. It asks for times spent before it in stillness of gazing. More important, it asks the one praying to allow himself to gaze on it. One must yield space within himself to admire the icon and its persistent beauty. An icon is a prayer transferred to art. When exquisite art combines with prayer, it becomes a work of worship and wonder. The art becomes a sacramental. It manifests to us God who came through all signs and symbols with truth.”

The second reflection is from Brother Claude, the artist of this particular icon. When I asked what the icon meant he stated the following, “The view we have of Christ in the icon is that of the Father, God looking down from heaven. It is also the view of St. Joseph as the Child Jesus lies in the manger atop his swaddling clothes. He is about to be tied up in them (a symbol of taking on human flesh). He is God’s “word” in the world…and that is underlined by the scroll in His hand (again tied up parchment ~ flesh). Jesus gazes lovingly on His mother as He mourns the loss of God the Father’s direct presence. Soon He will look to Joseph and be consoled. Will He find the same love and consolation if He looks upon us?”

As I have gazed and prayed for the past 14 years I have been given much in terms of the will of God, love, obedience, humility, poverty, labor, kindness, suffering and charity. The icon lettering reads, JESUS CHRIST – HE WHO IS. Each color in the icon has significance to me. The brown hay has its earth tone color. The blanket which Jesus is about to be wrapped in has red stripes, representing the blood He will give for us, and the white background signifies His purity. The blue ribbon will be used to hold the blanket secure to Jesus. This I feel is for the Blessed Mother Mary who will always help us remain close to Her Son Jesus. The nakedness of Jesus shows us His openness and willingness to love us unconditionally. The clutched right hand on his shoulder reminds us to take up our cross daily and follow Him with peace, trust and love. The scroll in his left hand is wrapped seven times with a string. This I feel is the need to read and follow the Scriptures daily in our lives. The legs are crossed under the child Jesus, reminding us that the steps we take in our “road of life” will always be with Christ if we remain close to the wood of the crib and the wood of the cross.

I have left the head of Christ for the last. The eyes are not looking directly at you. I feel this is important so that we will look to God the Father’s will first. We then look in love and service to our fellow man as Jesus did, before we look at self.

Finally the icon gives us the simple gift of Him, asking us only to know, love and serve Him in this life so that we may have eternal happiness when He calls us to our eternal home. Are you ready for the next step in love and service through surrender, trust and joy in your heart with the support of the cross? ~ Bill Fowler

Blessed is he who possesses Bethlehem in his heart and in whose heart Christ is born daily ~ St. Jerome

The Rosary and the Miracle of Surviving Hiroshima

2010-01-06T15:52:00.000-08:00

Today Tsutomu Yamaguchi died at age 93. He is Japan's only known survivor of both Hiroshima and Nagasaki atomic blasts. I pray he rests in peace.

There were also some survivors of the Hiroshima blast, a group of Jesuit Priests. These men give credit for their miracle to the rosary. Click here to read their fascinating story!

Happy New Year So Far?

2010-01-05T14:21:00.000-08:00

I hope everyone is having a Happy New Year! Blessings and peace are my wishes for your journey this year. :)

Keep A Candle Lit for the Baby Jesus

2009-12-23T16:44:00.000-08:00

Lately our readings have been on the travels of Joseph and Mary. One reading pointed out that Mary didn't have to go to Bethlehem, but Joseph did. Mary could have stayed in the comfort of home and family, but she didn't. This made me see again how Mary followed the will of God our Father. She ventured from what was familiar, safe and comfortable to bring Jesus to the world. She showed us there is no place Our Lord will not go to reach us!

The prayer on my mind lately has been for those far away from home this Christmas Season, and for those missing loved ones too. I received a letter from an old friend, and she had the following on her Christmas Letter: Please pray this season for the "military overseas/home and their families." Specifically for those families who will have a member missing from the table because their life was given for their country. A beautiful prayer and touching also because this friend lost her elderly mother recently. Here she is asking me to remember others rather than focusing on her loss.

One thing we can count on is change, but we can also count on Jesus to remain. Mary showed us no matter what the circumstances, no matter the uncharted territory we venture into, Jesus is there. He is never far away, and His heart is the home we can all share.

Keep a candle lit for the baby Jesus. Let us keep a soft place in our heart for Him to lay His head. Let us view the world through eyes first beholding a Savior's star, and let us grasp that wonder this Christmas Season! Amen

The Mind of Christ ~ Fowlerisms

2009-12-22T12:28:00.000-08:00

Many posts ago, I wrote about a man from church who gives me notes for reflection. We decided we may try to post, every Friday, his thoughts, and we're thinking we'll title those posts, Friday Fowlerisms. Obviously I am posting early because Friday is Christmas! Below is the first post from my friend and brother in Christ, Mr. Fowler. I hope it will be a good reflection for you.

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The first letter is "M" in the Mind of Christ ~ Motivation
~ Motivation is an inside out job not an outside in
~ Stress is created from the outside in

The important part of motivation is the seed which is planted in the heart. The seed that produces the fruit of the Holy Spirit will bring forth love and service to God and others. The seed of self produces the fruit of love of self (EGO ~ Edging God Out) and service to one's personal interest.

The bottom line is that the "M" in the Mind of Christ was his motivation to do the will of God our Father through His love and service for us.

Are we willing to follow Christ in our motivation today?

Rejoicing ~ Advent

2009-12-13T19:06:00.000-08:00

I haven't been blogging, because limited time has been a factor. My Mom and I have been running all over the place. Even though that sounds like the same old Christmas rush, this year I'm not letting my schedule dictate Advent. Does that make sense? Usually I worry "ahead" of time. I think, "Oh I have this coming up, and then that." This year, I'm taking each day as it comes. It's a calm Advent. It is an enjoyable preparation for Jesus. Next year, I hope to take lessons from this year and move closer to what is really important in this most Holy Season.

You are all in my prayers!

God our Father, you never force your way into our lives. You send your Son, a tiny child, to gently nudge our hearts. This Advent and Christmas Season we ask your Holy Spirit to warm our souls with your unfailing love. Amen

Approaching Our Cross in Thanksgiving

2009-11-26T16:47:00.000-08:00

This morning at Mass, I was thinking of days of old. My 86 year old dad was sitting to my left, and my husband was sitting to my right. I snuggled next to my husband and looked over at my dad. It made my heart hurt. When I was small, I snuggled next to him during Mass. I am thankful, more than you can know, to have my dad still with me. But this morning I realized times change. When we're young we think things will be the same forever, and as we age we know it is not so. Sometimes though I think I'm in denial. I always look for my parents to be here, even though I see a hand trembling or eyesight failing. My heart wants to burst at the thought of losing them. Our Lord knows what a baby He has in me. :)

On the way back from receiving communion, I happened to glance at one of the Stations of the Cross. It was one of the times where Jesus fell. The cross was on his back, and the cross caught my eye. How thankful I am to Jesus for saving us. How thankful I am to Him for letting me know I don't carry my cross alone. How thankful I am to know when things change, no matter how heavy that cross is, He will be there to help me. When I stumble and feel I can no longer make a step, He will be beside me to lift me up. He is with us always, and for that alone we can be thankful.

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Lord when painful times seem too much to take, keep us close in love and safe. Amen

No Place Like Home

2009-11-19T18:26:00.001-08:00

Today I returned from an overnight trip. I did enjoy it, but it will be nice to be back in my own bed tonight. There is no place like home, whether it is your home, your parent's, friend's home or even your hometown. It makes me think of what heaven must be like. It must be home. It must be that place where you wonder why you had to stay away for so long. It must be that place where we nestle into the Sacred Heart of Our Lord and rest in blissful wonder. This Thanksgiving I want to remember to thank God for preparing a place for us and welcoming us home in love!

Most Sacred Heart of Jesus OOAK Art

2009-11-11T16:58:00.000-08:00

This simple OOAK miniature artwork is my first attempt at an Ex Voto or Milagros. This is acrylic on canvas paper. I hope to do more in clay later on. Thank you for looking!

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Most Sacred Heart of Jesus, may the whole world burn with love for you!!!

It's Here Again

2009-11-07T16:28:00.000-08:00

It's that time of the year! Everything is getting busy already. I tried to knock out a big part of my Christmas shopping early because it makes me nervous. Next year, I'm going to simplify. Really, don't we have enough stuff?

How in the world does Christmas and everything else fall on the woman? Is it because Eve ate the apple? :) ~ As my husband says, "In the world of man, people just wouldn't get anything."

That's okay with me because when it is all said and done, I treasure the sentimental. An example is the cards signed by my parents, oops ~ signed by my mom. See there it is again, we even sign the cards for them. Do they even know how to write?

All kidding aside, I truly treasure this precious time with my family. My goal is to recognize my heavenly family too. How? By not losing sight of the fact that all love radiates from our Lord. He is the reason for every season, and the greatest Love of our life!

Don't Swear Like That ~ Part 2

2009-10-22T11:40:00.000-07:00

It is becoming the time of year when I get busy! I'm not able to post as often, but I am still checking in on my favorite bloggers.

My last post on swearing stopped short because long blogs are a turn off for some. The gist of that post is a loss of reverence for the Name of God. For the Jews, His Name was too sacred to be heard outside the holiest courts of the temple. We see in Sacred Scripture where Christ's Name hurled demons from their victims. Today His Name still holds our hope and His Holy Spirit embodies all that is Holy! How many times have we heard "holy" in front of "unholy" words?

On page 26 of this booklet, I read "Whatsoever you shall ask the Father in my name," He promised, "that will I do." This is the authority of Jesus.

Further, His name ... strong enough in its utterance to open the gates of heaven and to touch the very heart of the eternal Father. (Now that's what I call power!!!)

No wonder the Apostles began to preach and work miracles, "in His name."

How profound do you find the next paragraph? It would be interesting to know just how the Holy Name of Jesus Christ came to pass from this glorious and powerful invocation to the casual, contemptuous, and sinful use current in the world today. A dreadful sort of parody on prayer seems to be involved in the distortion. It is as if a brilliant enemy of Christ had taken the name of the Savior and twisted it to the most frivolous and debased uses.

Soon, quite too soon the Holy Name became the common "curse" word of men and women who hated Christ, no longer believed in Him, or regarded Him as of no importance. And so it has remained to this day.

Originally the Holy Name was meant to be used to work miracles of grace upon the world. It was a name for blessings. It was the name that rang with the certain hope of God's loving bounty and protection.

It looks like Part 2 will not be the end of this subject. For myself, I feel like reflecting on the above words from this little booklet. Words have power to heal and to hurt. Even the seemingly innocent "gee" used in the show Leave it to Beaver referred to the big "G" of God. I know I need to stop and think of the use of God's name, even in saying "Oh my God." It seems harmless, but I'm saying His Holy Name without thought and without meaning. Our Lord deserves so much more than my careless and thoughtless use of His Name. He suffered out of a great love for us, and we should remember this always!
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Our Almighty Father, our Precious Jesus and our Most Holy Spirit, thank you for knowing each of our names and lovingly calling us by our names. Help us to realize when we are thoughtless, and help us to bring others back to the Power of Your Name and and the Name of Your Love. Amen

In Relation to Eternity ~ Carmelite Jubilee

2009-10-15T13:49:00.000-07:00

This past weekend, my dad and I had the pleasure of attending the 50^th Jubilee of a dear woman named Sister Mary Joan. This Carmelite nun is Sister Mary of the Angels. No matter how much time passes before I see her, I always feel a kinship with her. Believe me I let “way” too much time pass.

Some of the descriptive words I’ve heard used for Sister are ~ precious, childlike, sweet and joyful. I have to agree with that description. There is no doubt she is a woman, but her sweet nature and faith reminds us Jesus calls us to be childlike so that we may enter into His Kingdom. Some people don’t understand the use of the term “childlike.” It doesn’t mean childish. It means a pure trust in God, seeing good in others, choosing to love, and finding joy in all creation.

At her reception I told her my Guardian Angel must have been whispering to me earlier that morning. On the way to pick up my dad, I was thinking of Mary and Martha. I thought about how Sister Mary Joan was like Mary, spending time with Jesus. As a Carmelite we think of her praying, reading, sacrificing and studying. Then I thought about how she was like Martha. She has her discipline which includes duties and service too. Every time we hear the story of Martha and Mary, it should cause us to think of our relationship with Christ. Myself, I’m lazy. I know I would be on the floor listening to Jesus while someone else busied about serving everyone else. I often wonder if Jesus is saying there is a time to serve and a time to listen. He didn’t chastise Martha. He just said Mary chose the best. Maybe focusing on Jesus causes everything else to fall into place.

Why did I think my Guardian Angel was whispering that day? The Gospel reading was on Martha and Mary which I believe was chosen by Sister. The priest remarked about the same thing with the contemplation of Mary and the service of Martha.

Finally I thought about our time here on earth as opposed to eternity. Here Sister Mary Joan has virtually given a lifetime to Our Lord. Her love for Him, her love for us, her service to Him and her service to us is a path that it seems few choose these days. Her example is one reminding us to take some time to be quiet and reflect. Her example is one reminding us to serve with love, however and whenever called. Thanks to God for Sister Mary Joan and the other Sisters at the Carmelite Monastery. Thank God for our brothers and sisters who have chose a life of religious service. I love you more than you can know, and I believe many others feel the same. We just fail to tell you or don’t tell you enough.

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Everyone please remember to pray for more vocations.

Missing You!!!

2009-10-07T13:31:00.000-07:00

Hi all,

I'm missing you, and I only have a moment to send out a quick post. It seems to be that time of the year where everything is happening. Last weekend I was out of town, this weekend I'm attending a wonderful lady's jubilee (Carmelite Nun), and the next weekend there is a birthday we're invited to join. You know how it goes on and on!

Anyway, I just want to say I'm praying for all of you, and I hope to have the chance to read some of your posts (for those who blog) soon!

God bless you and keep you precious ones!!!

A Revisit

2009-10-02T08:09:00.001-07:00

In honor of my Guardian Angel, I am linking to an earlier post.

Click here...Thank you Guardian Angel

A Gift of Today

2009-10-01T13:45:00.000-07:00

This morning, for some reason, I thought today was Monday. My scattered self ended up at the gym without my workout gear, so I left. Then on the way home I was pulled over for speeding. (This is kind of funny because people accuse me of driving like a little old lady.) My insurance card was expired. The insurance is current, but the card was not. Thankfully, that all worked out, and I’m off the hook. Then I stopped to gas up the car, only to realize I pulled up to the pump on the wrong side. I moved and ended up heading for the same pump as a young man in a truck. He waved me on. He was still waiting on a pump when I left. I said a quick prayer for him and wondered if his parents know what a nice young person they’ve raised. The phone rang, and a sweet lady asked me why I was late for my 1:00 appointment. I thought it was at 2:00. Anyway that all worked out too. The best thing was I didn’t get rattled by any of it. It has been a beautiful day, cool and crisp. One of my cats is walking all over me, and the world seems right.

Maybe today is a gift for the celebration of my patron Saint’s day, St. Therese. It is definitely a gift from God. I think I’ll go enjoy some more cat and me time. I hope your day has been a good one and if not, I pray tomorrow will be better!

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The cat in the photo is one of our four! Her name is Daisy. :)

"Don't Swear Like That!"

2009-09-28T13:07:00.000-07:00

Following up my last post.

First of all, when using the word curse, we have to remember the definition of the word. It is an action or desire of bringing evil or misfortune on someone.

Now to the booklet! I was surprised to find the following statement on page 12. “As a matter of fact the constant use of the oaths and curses have resulted in their losing all meaning.” I didn’t realize so much cursing was going on in the 1940’s. But this is a true statement. The more a word is said the more it is accepted. Even the word “pregnant” was taboo. My grandmother was horrified when she first heard it said in general conversation. She was accustomed to “expecting” or “in the family way.”

This booklet also covered the use of the name of God and Jesus Christ alone. How often do we hear or say “Oh my God!” Someone once told me; when we say this, think of it as our lips to God’s ear. The point is, don’t say His precious name in such a frivolous manner. On page 14, “Such usage is the sign of a complete lack of faith. God means nothing…Christ has lost all value in their eyes. So the Holy Names are tossed about in careless indifference.” It further states even gee whiz is a parody on Jesus Christ, and the origin is soon forgotten.

Words full of meaning become meaningless, page 16. “G-d damn you!” or “G-d damn him!” say the thoughtless modern man and woman. If we…thought of what the phrases meant, we might drop them forever from our vocabularies. And on page 19…It was left for thoughtless people of succeeding ages…to take that horrible curse and make it part of the most commonplace speech.

Finally, why don’t we use the reverse? Why don’t we say “God bless” instead of “G-d damn?” Or we could say “Go to heaven” instead of “Go to hell!” Maybe we don’t say the kind words because of the impact we desire.

There is more, and I will continue on my next post. But here is something to think about. This is basically covering curse words! What about those words that don’t carry a curse, but fall under the title? What about words which should really fall under obscene or vulgar?

Note: I have a real problem with GD, but I was typing from the booklet.

What is Your Take on Cursing?

2009-09-27T10:57:00.000-07:00

I found an old booklet on swearing, and I've been reading it when I get a chance. I plan to post some of what I find when I finish it. But, I'm curious or nosey...

What do you think about foul language?

Thankful for His Thoughtfulness

2009-09-21T11:28:00.000-07:00

This weekend the thought that came to me and stayed with me was the blessings I've received. You've heard the song about thanking God for unanswered prayers! Well this is thanking God for the answer to prayers I've never prayed. That is a testament to the love of our Father. He gives without ceasing, and He gives without request.

Thank God for loving us!

Do You Know About The Living Ark of The Covenant?

2009-09-14T09:02:00.000-07:00

As I’ve stated before, one blog posting can lead to another. Recently I posted on the Nativity of Mary. In that post, I remarked about Mary’s participation in the redemption of man in relation to Eve’s participation in the fall of man. (Gen 3:15) This post is about the Ark of the Covenant. Mary is known as the living Ark of the Covenant. When I first learned of this, I remember being delighted.

The earliest prototype in the Old Testament is the Ark of Noah. Then there is the Ark of the Covenant made of the finest Gold which contained the Ten Commandments, some of the manna that fell from heaven for the Israelites wandering the desert and the staff of Aaron. So what does this prototype have to do with Mary? Well let’s take a look! Remember God had the Ark built to certain specifications and made of the purest gold. Here we have Mary made of the purest flesh. We find the Old Testament Ark carried the Ten Commandments; Mary carried Jesus the Word made flesh. The OT Ark carried the staff of Aaron (signifying his priestly position); Mary carried Jesus the High Priest. And the OT Ark carried a gold ciborium with the manna God provided in the desert. Mary carried Jesus the Eucharist, the Bread of Life.

When Mary arrived to visit her cousin, Elizabeth exclaimed, “Who am I that the Mother of my Lord should come to me?” (Luke 1:43) We are reminded of when David says in 2 Samuel 6:9-10; “How can the Ark of the Lord come to me?” Also John the Baptist, leapt in his mother’s womb when Mary arrived (Luke 1:44). Remember David danced with joy in front of the Ark when it was brought to Jerusalem. But that is not all, The Ark stayed in the house of Obededom for three months, and God blessed the household of Obededom. Mary stayed with Elizabeth and Zacharias for three months, and brought blessing to their house.

And the final thought for this post is beautiful. The Holy of Holies was empty at the time of Christ and Mary. So the Ark of the OT was not there. How could the priests of the Temple know that the “presentation” of the child Mary in the Temple, was the entrance of the living Ark ~ the living Ark of the New Covenant?!

Our Lady carried Our Lord, and in obedience to God, from her arms she handed him over for the Salvation of the world. Today and always, she points us towards her Son, her Savior and ours.

Project 2996 September 09, 2001 Remembering Sei-Lai Khoo in 2009

2009-09-11T07:45:00.000-07:00

As part of a project to remember the victims of 911, I was given the name Sei-Lai Khoo. I found her name spelled also as Seilai Khoo. I couldn't find much about her, other than she worked for Fred Alger Management, World Trade Center and co-managed mutual funds. I was hoping to find a photo, but I've yet to see one. Her age was listed as 38, and her residence as Jersey City, NJ. There was a short quote from her brother Yeng Leng Khoo, and the statement both came from Malaysia. She was here before him and showed him the ropes when he arrived.

I immediately wondered if Sei-Lai came here to pursue a lifelong dream. I wonder what she would be doing today, and I wonder what her family is doing on this anniversary.

Sei-Lai's age today would be close to mine. From the little bit I read about her, I get the impression she had so much to contribute. She was probably coming into her own and ready to continue blazing a trail through life. And now I know Sei-Lai will always be a part of my life because of this memorial. If you are reading this, I hope you will remember her too.

Dear Sei-Lai,

Eight years ago I was working Base Operations in the Mississippi Air National Guard. One of our pilots came and told me a plane had crashed into the World Trade Center. We all thought it was a fluke, a horrible accident. We ran to watch the replay on the television, only to see the second plane crash. We then realized this was more than a fluke. Sei-Lai, I didn't know you were there until today. I didn't know anyone in the towers. But I am saddened for your family, for all the families and friends. And though this tribute to you is not fancy or even worded well, I want you to know I will remember you. And I will now have a name that will stay with me for the rest of my life. Though I didn't know you in this life, maybe I will get to meet you in the life to come. I wish I knew more about you, but this I do know, I will not forget you, the others who perished or our military and others who have sacrificed so much since then. Rest in peace, Sei-Lai!

Margaret

Please pray for the families of the victims. Please pray for peace throughout the world.

Tending the Soul for God's Will

2009-09-09T18:11:00.000-07:00

Before we can serve God in other fields we must till, plant, weed, prune and bear fruit in our own fields.

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The will precedes the intellect.

Everyday I have little readings I do, and the first sentence is a paraphrase from one. The second comes from a CD set I was listening to earlier.

You know how you can read several pages or listen to thirty minutes of something, and out of it all you find a couple of nuggets of wisdom or teachings? When you go back to it later, what you see or hear can be something totally different. I’m trying to make a habit of writing down what strikes me that day, whether it comes from my pastor, family, friend, reading or a talking donkey. Okay I don’t expect to find a talking donkey or anything, but you never know. It can happen right?

The first sentence struck me because of what I am always asking God. What am I suppose to be doing? I never get a good feel for the answer. This sentence makes me think, “Maybe I’m not ready to do what God desires because I haven’t tended my own field.” Tending our own field requires a lifetime of cultivating, but we should bear some fruit at some point!

Then the second sentence struck me because there is the constant fight. My will wants to do one thing when my intellect knows I should do something else. My will either justifies the end or figures it’s not so bad after all. But no matter how small the infraction, it chips away at the rich soil my soul should be steeped in. How can I grow the tree to bear fruit, if I’m not enriching my soul? My friend Karinann’s blog post, Out With The Old, In With The New, touched on the same subject. At first I thought how discouraging this “trying” to become anew can be. Then it came to me. It is better to be questioning than to think everything is okay. I think when I’m rolling along that track saying and thinking, “I’m okay” is when I am in the greatest danger. So I pray God will help me to examine my actions or lack of action and continually tend my soul for His desire.

She said YES ~ Yes she did! Happy Birthday Mary!!!

2009-09-08T13:54:00.000-07:00

Today we celebrate the Nativity of Mary. When hearing the word “Nativity” we think of the birth of Jesus rather than Mary. I remember a time when I was worried about loving Mary. Was I giving her love due only to God? Our gentle Lord let me know there is a reason we cannot measure love. It is because love is infinite. There is more than enough to spread around.

There is this man I used to work with who told me God randomly picked Mary to be the Mother of Jesus. I’m sure he went on and on about it because he knew of my Catholicism. He basically said she was at the right place at the right time. Even then I found it humorous. I could picture God pointing His finger around saying, “maybe that one…no, I think that one.” I wasn’t able to dialogue with him way back when. But as time passed there is one thing I have learned about our Creator. He is ordered, He is a designer, and He would not leave the Mother of His Child to chance. Even humans (responsible ones) don’t randomly pick a person to form a family.

It was funny because as a youngster people told me Catholics, like me, had to pray to Mary to get to God. I didn’t quite understand it because I prayed to God every night. Did these people know something about Catholics I didn’t? Now I know they didn’t know much, if anything, about Catholics. Well as I grew in my faith God began to give me answers about Mary, sometimes from the questions of others. One such question came from another guy at work. He asked me, “Why did God make it so Jesus would come from Mary?” He clarified by asking, “Why did He come from a woman?” I can only guess he was wondering why God didn’t just show up. I thought of all the questions! I’d never heard that one, but I told him I’d try to find out. Shortly after that my dad handed me a book, and there was the answer. In the beginning woman (Eve) came from man (Adam), and through this man came sin. For our redemption God reversed this occurrence and Mary gave birth to Jesus. This time man came from woman, and through this God-Man, Jesus, comes salvation.

So here I began to see Mary’s role. When she said, “yes” to God, her place was fulfilled. She holds a unique position. She is the daughter of the Father, the spouse of the Holy Spirit, and the mother of the Son. She is not Deity, but she is intricately entwined with the Trinity. And from there she calls us to the Glory of God. She is forever pointing not to herself, but to Him! Where Eve participated in the fall of man, Mary participates in the redemption. Satan thought he’d won with the disobedience of Eve. Oh but he underestimated the obedience of Mary. But the serpent would soon learn this when God Himself said, “I will put enmity between you and the woman and between your seed and her seed…”

Thankful for the Small Things

2009-09-04T08:44:00.000-07:00

This morning I stayed in bed a bit longer than needed. I quickly dressed, hoping I'd make it to Mass on time. The thing is, we had a Communion service because our priest is just now coming home from Ireland. While I miss the Consecration of the Eucharist, I told myself, our Lord is present in the already consecrated hosts.

Jumping in my car, I detoured and entered the highway with about five minutes left to making it to the church. The stop light caught me. When it turned green, I was turning left and did not have a turn signal. I made it to the light before it turned yellow, and I noticed oncoming traffic was very far away. I sailed into the church parking lot. I thanked God for clearing the path for me. He does that so many times in life. He wants to us to have a clear path. We throw the obstacles in most of the time. And when the obstacles aren't of our doing, He still offers us His help to continue on our way. Sometimes He gives us a red light telling us to stop and wait! Other times He gives us a yellow light telling us we can move ahead but with caution and being prepared to stop and wait again.

The added bonus to making it to this Communion service, was I entered the hall to find my son and his wife waiting for me. They are trying to attend Mass before going to work. I didn't know they would be there today, but they assumed I would be there. Of course, God knew all of this already. Isn't He a wonderful Papa? He loves us so much! I love Him too and wish to love Him even more!

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Please remember my son and his wife in your prayers. They are becoming on fire for their faith. Please pray they continue a lifetime of loving and serving God. Also I ask you to pray for my other son and his girlfriend. She became Catholic but neither are practicing. I'm praying the Holy Spirit will ignite their hearts. God bless you, and I'm praying for all of you too!

The Third Floor Window ~ Another Perspective

2009-09-02T18:51:00.000-07:00

Recently I posted on Colleen Spiro's book, The Third Floor Window. Please click here to read another review from a different perspective than mine. Patricia, like Colleen, is a lady who helps other incest survivors on their journey.

Stay With Me Lord ~ St. Pio ~ Life, Hope, and Meaning

2009-08-31T16:32:00.001-07:00

Stay with me, Lord, for You are my life, and without You I am without meaning and hope. Saint Padre Pio of Pietrelcina

Some versions of this prayer have the words “without fervor” instead of “without meaning and hope.” I have to say I like the prayer using the latter. So many times in life we hear people say my life had no meaning until I met Jesus, or I have no hope without God.

For me, a life without meaning is not life but death. If we define the word meaning as special significance, then life without Our Lord is devoid of meaning. I know some people will disagree, but stay with this thought. If I did not have the love of God, if I did not have God, what is the purpose of living? If our lives are not an eternal testimony to His love, then why are we here? I often think of the inheritance I value the most. It is the faith of my parents. And this faith was handed down to them. But God gave me a free will. Why? I think simply so we will love him freely. He could force us to love Him, but is that love? He wants us to come to Him freely and in love.

What about hope? The archaic definition for hope is trust. Without Our Lord where do I place my trust, in myself? Believe me I’ve tried that, and it seemed to work for awhile. When the rug was yanked from beneath me, I knew then trusting me was something I couldn’t do anymore. If we define hope as anticipation or desire, without God where is hope or what is hope? For me hope, without God, has no meaning. Our lives are designed to have meaning, and our hearts are designed to have hope. This hope is in a Love strong enough to die a cruel death on a cross, so that we can rise to a Love everlasting.

I beg You ~ Stay with me, Lord, for You are my life, and without You I am without meaning and hope. Amen!

The Third Floor Window ~ A Survivor's Story of Hope

2009-08-28T11:50:00.001-07:00

Recently I was the recipient of a book by Colleen Spiro, titled The Third Floor Window. It is a true story and based upon Colleen’s life as a child of sexual abuse. The added heartbreak to this abuse is, it was at the hands of her father, the man who was supposed to protect her.

As someone unfamiliar with abuse, it is hard to fathom one would harm a precious child. As a person of faith it is crushing to find that child’s innocence, love and trust being violated. We are taught our bodies are temples of God, and these impure acts upon those abused are a desecration of God’s temple.

One portion of Colleen’s book is the crux of my beginning to understand. On page 72 she wondered where God was during her abuse. She sees Jesus in the corner of her bedroom, and He is crying. She saw pain and sadness on His face. It was then she knew Jesus was with her, and He knew her pain and suffering. She goes on to write it is important to her for others to understand what she’s been through. She doesn’t want to be minimized, to be alone.

And the shared suffering with Jesus, helps me see where we minimize others and desert them. When we do these things, we are doing it to Jesus too.

It’s true, only those who have similar experiences in life can relate to each other. I believe this book is significant because Colleen wants people to know the abuse still happens, and no matter how much time passes it is not something to be packed away and forgotten. It is a lifelong commitment for survivors to move forward in hope and healing.

The message I sent her after the first reading included this phrase, “…now I understand why some people don’t make it.” She responded that is what she wants her book to be about. It is not only for other victims, it is definitely for the rest of us. It is for us to see why some people deal with lack of trust, fear of rejection and questioning of friendship and love. It’s a lesson we need to remember and write on our hearts.

Finally, I still wondered why God didn’t intervene. I know there are many things that are a mystery, but I fear Our Lord will give me the following answer. “You Margaret, have not prayed enough, sacrificed enough and loved enough.” It is true; evil gets a foothold when we allow it. Why do I say this? Because we are the Body of Christ, we are His hands on earth. We are family, and we are responsible for each other. So for those reading this, please add these children and adult children to your daily prayers. Offer acts of kindness and sacrifice for them. And though it is difficult, pray for their abusers too.

Thank you Colleen for writing this book, I needed to read it and so do many others.

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Colleen Spiro is a certified spiritual director, a Benedictine Oblate and is employed as a parish secretary. She leads retreats and has written several articles that have been published in Christian magazines. Colleen lives with her husband in Florida.

Visit Surviving by Grace to learn more about Colleen and how to order The Third Floor Window.

Hi St. Monica and St. Augustine ~ Over Here!!!

2009-08-27T13:24:00.000-07:00

St. Monica and St. Augustine, I know your feast days are side by side. I know today is St. Monica's day, but I always think of you as two for one. In a way it's true, you are two for One. Anyway, I just want to say thank you for your prayers. How many times have I begged you both to pray for my sons? I still do.

Jesus hears frequently from me too! He can thank you St. Monica for my persistence. I just tell Him, Lord I'm counting on You for these boys and all of us. I'm depending on You. I'm trusting You. Yes, Lord I'm expecting You to see us all safely home.

St. Monica you prayed for, cried for and followed your son ~ Augustine. Your prayers were rewarded in a magnificent manner. St. Augustine some where along the way, you allowed God to penetrate your intellect, will, heart and soul. Yes, I'm counting on our Lord, and I'm still depending on your prayers. Because that is what family is all about!

Thanks again for everything ~

I love you, Margaret

Bloodmoney ~ A Documentary

2009-08-25T14:18:00.001-07:00

I found this fascinating quote today:

I found this over at David Marciniak's blog. Bloodmoney is a documentary that exposes the abortion industry. It also brings to light not only the cost in countless human unborn lives, but also the serious consequences and effects on the women who undergo abortions. As David says on his blog, "This could be big." I've posted a trailer below, but you can visit the home site of the film for details on the film and for information on how to get it distributed. This is a film that needs to be seen, perhaps now more than ever. Spread the word!Karinann, Daughter of the King, Aug 2009

You should read the whole article.

Suicide and Faith in the Love and Mercy of God

2009-08-24T13:22:00.000-07:00

As you bloggers know, one post can lead to another. Angel of God... led me to this post.

After my friend committed suicide, I wondered about her. Over the years I’d heard so many different takes on people who take their life. But this wasn’t a case where she killed someone else and then herself. It wasn’t a case where she embezzled money and was about to be caught. The two instances just listed have variables for sure, and we can't be certain such individuals are only angry or desperate. It is just to point out, my friend did not fall into this type of category. She was tormented by things which led her down this path. And I wonder if the medication she was prescribed contributed to her final act. Mental illness is supposed to affect one out of four families. And we know there are many people who are depressed or have been depressed. There are people I know personally, who contemplated suicide but didn't follow through. And in one case, God intervened. But maybe He intervenes always, and this particular person responded. As for my friend, I knew her background, and I knew what she would do when confronted with love...

Shortly after her funeral, I had the opportunity to sit down and discuss my friend’s death with a priest. He told me to remember God is merciful. He further stated we don’t know what transpires between a soul and God at death. Right then I knew when my friend saw Our Father, perfect love, she fell into His arms. Why? Because He offered what she was seeking her whole life ~ love and acceptance.

Judgment belongs to God and God alone. We must remember He loves those who have committed suicide, more than we do. Our loved ones are His children. And what does a loving parent do when finding a child broken and spent? He opens His arms.

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Lord, hide in the shadow of your wings, those who are depressed, afraid and lonely. Gently soothe their souls, bless their hearts and bring them into the abode of your Most Sacred Heart. Amen

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Click here if you are interested in reading what the Catholic Catechism has on Suicide.

Letter Directing to Love God, Warns of Demons

2009-08-18T12:58:00.000-07:00

The posts leading up this particular post started with first, one titled Guardian Angels and followed by Angel of God…in August 1991.

I feel like I need to give a bit of background for this next piece. My friend I referred to in Angel of God…, committed suicide. She was what I considered to be an intellectual. Her remarks at times flew right over my head. She wasn’t trying to talk over my head and assumed I knew what she meant. It would be difficult to find someone as well read as she. Yet she seemed to be disconnected in some respect. She was also very sensitive, to the point of not being able to let go of the sight of starving children on TV. It seemed to me these type of injustices layered in her mind and never tucked away. She was not a religious person. I remember her telling me though; my parents praying for me daily was amazing. What I took for granted she admired. She visited churches and relayed a story about one of those visits to me. She finally made her way to the middle of a pew in the center of the church. This was a feat for her because she didn’t like to stand out. At some point, every member of the congregation hit the floor. She alone was standing. She told me she tiptoed out over everyone, and that was the end of her church visits. The last thing she was doing before she died was reading the Bible.

The letter referred to in my last post is engraved on my mind. Her chosen words, so odd and out of character. Her message to me was not a long one, but sometimes length doesn’t mean significant. I won’t post it verbatim, but the following is the gist of what she said.

Her letter began with telling me she didn’t expect me to understand what she did. She told me to love God and to teach my sons about God, because there are demons that roam the earth. She ended by telling me she loved me, and she thanked me for being her friend.

First of all, I didn’t feel worthy of her love or friendship. My children were both under the age of five, I was a single mom, and I was not equipped at the time to help her spiritually. But what struck me were her directions about God. As stated earlier, she wasn’t religious or even spiritual. Then of course her statement of demons roaming the earth was startling. She never spoke of such, and she wasn’t referring to personal demons.

One other strange side note about this story is the song, “My Favorite Things.” I’d given her a snow globe, and this was the tune. She was so delighted with this gift. After she died, I asked for it back. One day, out of the blue, it started playing. And it seems every August I either hear the song somewhere, or I’ll start humming it.

Why do I think people need to know what her letter said? The reason is because there are people who believe in God, but do not believe satan exists. It’s not reasonable, because Sacred Scripture refers to satan. Yes we are surrounded by angels, but demons also roam the earth and we should be aware. Her exact words, “…demons roaming the earth,” makes me think of the St. Michael prayer. A prayer she didn’t even know.

Saint Michael the Archangel,
defend us in battle.
Be our protection against the wickedness and snares of the devil.
May God rebuke him, we humbly pray;
and do Thou, O Prince of the Heavenly Host -
by the Divine Power of God -
cast into hell, satan and all the evil spirits,
who roam throughout the world seeking the ruin of souls.

Amen.

Angel of God...in August 1991

2009-08-13T16:15:00.000-07:00

In one blog post this last July, I wrote about Guardian Angels. I was so interested in reading your stories of belief and encounters with angels. Several people left comments or links to their angel moments and incidents where loved ones were protected by angels. Back in this same post, I wrote of my plan to share one encounter I had many years ago with my angel.

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The month and year of this encounter was August, 1991. Earlier that year, I’d called a friend of mine to chat. Later she told me my phone call, that particular day, stopped her from taking her life. At the time I had no idea she was even contemplating such. She was committed to a facility where she was supposed to get help. Having no experience in this type of situation, I made her promise she’d never commit suicide. She promised me she wouldn’t. She even joked about linking pinkie fingers and promising. Naively I believed her.

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In August she ended up missing. Everyone feared the worst. I was pulling into my driveway when I heard a voice say, “There is a letter from (Name protected), in your mailbox.” Sure enough, I pulled a plain envelope with my name and address from the box. I knew it was from my friend. I recognized her writing even though the only mail I’d ever received from her before was a Christmas Card.

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Later I wondered if maybe it was my friend telling me the letter was there, but then I remembered the voice saying, “…from (her name).” She would’ve said, “…from me.”

Quickly I ran inside and called her house. Someone I didn’t know answered the phone, and I told him about the letter. He then told me what deep down I already knew, they’d found her body that afternoon.

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Later, I will post what she said in her letter because I think it is important. But it will have to wait because even after eighteen years, I still get emotional thinking about it.

There have been other encounters with my angel, but this one still stuns me. I guess my angel wanted to warn me about what I was about to find. Also, maybe this heavenly messenger was gently letting me know my friend was already gone. For whatever reason, I’m thankful to God for the gift of my angel. I don’t tell Him thank you enough, and I certainly don’t tell my angel of my appreciation for the guidance, protection and love sent my way.

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Angel of God, my guardian dear ~ to whom God’s love commits me here ~ ever this day, be at my side ~ to light and guard, to rule and guide. Amen

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The Catechism of the Catholic Church; 336 on angels.

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“From infancy to death human life is surrounded by their watchful care and intercession. Beside each believer stands an angel as protector and shepherd leading him to life. Already here on earth the Christian life shares by faith in the blessed company of angels and men united to God.”

It Could Be Us ~ You Never Know ~ Please Pray

2009-08-08T12:53:00.000-07:00

Reading Deacon John's blog today inspired me to write this post.

When people live in a country like we do, others are easily forgotten. It is almost hard for us to believe what is happening in other parts of the world. But what is happening, is people are being persecuted and martyred because of their Christianity. My intention at Mass for quite awhile now, has been to pray for them. I received that direction from a priest as penance after the Sacrament of Reconciliation years ago.

Please pray this prayer or your own.

Lord I pray for courage and strength for those, throughout the world, being persecuted or martyred for the Kingdom of God. And I pray for the conversion of unbelievers and sinners. Amen

The Holy Spirit's Illumination and Purification

2009-08-05T17:37:00.000-07:00

My readings and thoughts of lately continue to reflect on humility. In my own journey, I find myself not quite knowing what I’m suppose to be doing when it comes to God’s will. I’m not expecting an angel to visit and give me some fantastic mission, even though that would be something! But it does seem like I would have some inkling of direction. At times I wonder if I’m missing the big picture, the picture consisting of the “little” moments followed by my patron saint, “The Little Flower.”

One recent reading focused on the gift of understanding from the Holy Spirit. Our intellect is limited by our human comprehension. Only by the light of the Holy Spirit can we begin to understand the truths of our faith. The words we study, read with eyes of faith, are profoundly illuminated when we are infused with the Spirit of God.

The other realization is that our hearts must be swept of the stains of sin and self. The windows to our souls need to be as clean and clear as possible. When we ask for the Holy Spirit to illumine us, we should prepare a place for Him. We should be free of attachments and ill feelings. How can we receive the full gift of knowledge from the Holy Spirit if our being is harboring worldly distractions?

“Help me to purify my heart, because what I desire to see is pure but my means of seeing it, impure. Come to me, O God, and purify me by Your grace; purify my heart with Your aid and strength. If I receive You into my heart during this present life, after my death You will admit me into Your presence.” St. Augustine

Lord, I know my heart and soul are not free of worldly attachments and baggage. I need your help in ridding me of whatever keeps Your light from brilliantly shining knowledge, wisdom and Your will into my being. Amen

Stay with me, Lord, because I am weak...St. Pio

2009-08-01T19:20:00.000-07:00

Stay with me, Lord, because I am weak and I need Your strength, that I may not fall so often. St. Pio of Pietrelcina

A recent post on Stay with me, Lord covered the first sentence of St. Pio’s prayer. The above sentence is the second part. Plus my last post was on The Cross and Humility. This second sentence fits nicely with recognizing humility. At times, it seems as if we only realize we are weak when we fall. We’ve all heard the phrase, “I hit rock bottom.” When we fall, sometimes we chastise ourselves to the point of insulting God’s infinite mercy. All we have to do is open our arms to Him. His love for us is so great; He cannot help but reach for us, His wounded child. He lifts us up with strength to move forward, He will even carry us.

The weight of our sins caused Our Lord to fall on His way to Calvary. But the weight did not cause Him to remain on the ground. Alone we cannot carry our cross, but with Him we are able to stand each time and continue the journey.

Lord, when we acknowledge our weakness, You pour Grace upon us. Help us to remember to open our arms in response to Your love, and to fall unabashedly into Your merciful Heart. Amen

The Cross and Humility

2009-07-30T16:05:00.000-07:00

Whenever we are having a family meal, my Dad likes to make the same joke. First he lets everyone know he is the patriarch. Then when we try to let him serve first, he waves everyone ahead and says he is practicing humility! We always get a good laugh from it.

St. Mary Magdalen dei Pazzi says, “This is the remedy to fix my gaze on You, Incarnate Word, hanging on the Cross. As soon as You see a humble soul looking at You in this way, You are quickly moved to look at it, and the effect of Your divine glance is like that of a ray of sunshine on the earth: it warms it and prepares it to bring forth fruit. This is the way You act, O divine Word, who by the light of Your glance, drain my soul of all its pride, and consume it in Your fire. No one can acquire humility if he does not fix his gaze on You, O Word, on the Cross.”

To humble self means rooting out all independence, pride and will. This is what we think of when we hear the words, meek of heart. Antonyms of humble include proud, rude and exalted. We think of people who are arrogant, unkind and selfish.

There was a time when I thought humility meant wimpy. Now I know, to be humble takes strength and courage. It is a discipline. There we see disciple in discipline. We find freedom in discipline. Otherwise we are slaves to our vices.

St. Mary Magdalen dei Pazzi reminds us that Our Lord shines upon the welcoming and humble. He warms these hearts with His Divine Mercy. And from these hearts springs forth the fruits of His love.

Lord, help me root out self. I can’t do it alone, I need Your strength. Amen

Stay With Me, Lord ~ St. Pio of Pietrelcina

2009-07-29T19:59:00.000-07:00

“Stay with me, Lord, for it is necessary to have You present so that I do not forget You. You know how easily I abandon You.” St. Pio of Pietrelcina

I am struck by the beauty of Padre Pio’s prayers. This line reminds me to ask Jesus to stay with me after receiving Him in the Blessed Sacrament. How quick we forget Him when we walk back into the world. We forget Him when we see the sick struggling to make it through the day. We forget Him when we see the lonely wandering the street. We forget Him when we see the depressed sinking in despair. We forget Him in so many ways.

How often do we abandon Him? I know I’ve abandoned Him many times when I’ve seen someone in need. I’ve abandoned Him when I thought I had better things to do. What could be better than being with Him? Just like His disciples I’ve forgotten and abandoned Him, but He remembers me and stays with me.

Once again, “Stay with me, Lord, for it is necessary to have You present so that I do not forget You. You know how easily I abandon You.” St. Pio of Pietrelcina

Baptism, Funeral Pall and New Life

2009-07-28T19:39:00.000-07:00

Having a chance to visit with my elderly aunt the other day was as always a treat. She was asking me about the cloth covering the casket during the Catholic funeral. It seemed like I remembered this had to do with baptism. Later I found that to be correct. The white cloth is reminiscent of the white baptismal gown or garment. Just as the person is welcomed into the Church community as a new Christian in baptism, the deceased is now entering a new life in the resurrection of Christ.

This white cloth is called a pall. It is a sign of our resurrection and hope for a new life with Christ.

God's Place in Hollywood?

2009-07-24T13:23:00.000-07:00

Usually not caring about what Hollywood says or does I have to admit one headline, touting Brad Pitt doesn't believe in God, caught my eye. A German Web site reporter asked him if he believed in God. Pitt's response was supposedly, "No, no, no!" My first thought of the three negatives was, "NO to the Father, NO to the Son, NO to the Holy Spirit." He further states he is probably a small percent atheist and a larger percent agnostic. As all of us, he is entitled to his belief.

Brad Pitt aside, Hollywood doesn't seem to find God politically correct. We see some actors, actresses, producers, etc., offer Him thanks when winning an award, but the acknowledgement seems to end there. I am not the Hollywood elite's judge, and I can't see into their hearts. But where are the movies, TV shows and programming of old? What happened to good, clean and often very funny sitcoms? Where are the values and morals in these stories? Have you noticed the lack of creativity? We see one remake after another. Recently having sat through some movie previews, I was amused at the similarity of each. There were a lot of great effects, things blowing up, things blowing up, and things blowing up. Did I mention things blowing up?! The blood and gore is disturbing, and the language makes one wonder if these people just lack a good vocabulary.

Sure I'm rambling here, but I have to wonder. Does a separation from our Creator, actually make us less creative? Hmmmm...What do you think?

The Third Floor Window Book Giveaway

2009-07-23T19:34:00.000-07:00

This post is for a link for a wonderful woman named Colleen Spiro. This month is the anniversary of the publication of her book The Third Floor Window. She is generously giving away a copy of her book, and if you click on the above title you will find a way to enter her giveaway. Colleen is a survivor of incest, and this book is about her journey and how God has helped her find hope and healing. Please visit her blog, she is an inspiration!

Migraines and Thankfulness

2009-07-22T16:28:00.001-07:00

When my husband walked into our room earlier, I told him I had a headache. Then I describe it as, "You know, the kind that makes you feel like you're going to toss your lunch." He immediately said, "Migraine!" He's familiar with these himself. After I asked him to turn off a lamp, I realized it has been awhile since I've had a migraine. This is evident because I didn't even recognize it right away. I remained still and drifted off to sleep. Waking later, I knew the migraine was gone. Sometimes I can sleep it away.

I was thankful this crushing headache was gone, but I was also thankful it happened. It made me see again where I take things for granted. Not having a migraine for quite sometime was something I hadn't appreciated. It causes me to think of the many things others deal with that I've never endured. This is the one area I have improved in somewhat but not enough, I need to be more thankful.

Lord, thank you for the infinite blessings you've sent to me. Thank you for each breath I take, for You breathing my being to physical life and for the Holy Spirit's breath of spiritual life. Amen

A Parent's Lament

2009-07-19T19:06:00.000-07:00

My children will tell you I was an overprotective mother, which is true to a certain degree. I grew up when children roamed neighborhoods, and doors were left unlocked. By the time my children were born, we heard stories of child abduction and warnings such as, don’t put your child’s name on shirts, backpacks, etc…This was because a predator could call the name acting like they knew the child.

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There are certainly regrets I have from raising my children but being overprotective isn’t one of them. The regret is my selfishness and not spending more time with them. Don’t get me wrong my two boys gave me some gray hairs.

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One particularly bad day, I was taking a bath and lamenting to our Lord. I use the word “lamenting” because it just sounds better than complaining. Anyway, I was lamenting the fact that I must be a sorry parent because I was having a tough time with these boys. As I continued to groan about my inadequacies, God interrupted my thoughts. He said, “Listen, I’m the perfect parent and look at my children running amuck!” I really didn’t expect God to use a work like “amuck!” I expected something like, “Listen thou, I am thy perfect parent and gaze upon my children sinning endlessly.” But He said “amuck.” Well that got my attention, and I said, “You’re right, Father.” He probably smiled when I said He was right, because He’s always right. He didn’t need me to confirm it. Feeling much better, I thanked Him and seeing as we were chatting already, I asked Him a question. “Father, when you’re talking about your children not always acting like little angels, are you talking about me?” I waited. I asked, “God?” I waited again and still no answer, maybe a chuckle but no answer. Opening my mouth to lament the fact he wouldn’t answer, I realized He was talking about me. He is the perfect parent, and we are his imperfect children. The good news is He loves us imperfections and all...even when we are running “amuck!”

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Father, thank you for loving us through the good and bad times. Amen

Carmelite Monastery Jackson MS Heaven Look

2009-07-16T13:07:00.001-07:00

Today the Carmelite Monastery in Jackson, MS is celebrating Our Lady of Mt. Carmel. The actual ceremony will be held Sunday evening, July 19th. For many years I attended Mass on Saturday morning in the beautiful chapel located there. The stain glass, Stations of the Cross, and statues are older and reminiscent of churches of my youth. I miss the stunning trappings of God's house, decorated with stories of His love and family members. When my children were small and we walked into the chapel, they would look around in awe. You could see it on their face. It always seemed to be a holier, quieter and safe place.

Today in honor of Our Lady of Mt. Carmel, I am linking to my first post here on this blog, because she always tells us to look to Jesus and Heaven!

Bad Thoughts During Prayer?

2009-07-13T14:43:00.000-07:00

This post on prayer may seem strange to some, but others will immediately understand. Many years ago when I began to pray in a more meditative manner, instead of the grocery list of prayer I followed most of my life, I found my prayer time was being attacked. It was disturbing to say the least because I stared having vile thoughts during prayer. Right away I thought something was wrong with me, but thankfully two things happened letting me know I was actually doing something right.

The first thing I did was go to the Sacrament of Reconciliation. When I told the priest what was happening, he leaned back in his chair and smiled. He told me to keep praying. He said the evil one was assaulting me because he didn’t want me drawing close to God. Shortly after that my own devout dad told me this same thing happened to him. Believe me it was nice to know I wasn’t alone. My dad told me to pray these words when it happened, “Father, I offer up these thoughts for some soul right now in danger of dying in mortal sin.” Or you can say, “I offer up these thoughts for some soul right now in danger of dying and not in a state of grace.” Both are really the same. Anyway, the next time this happened to me, I prayed that prayer and the thoughts left immediately. At that point I couldn’t even think the thoughts if I tried! Interestingly it turns these vile thoughts to the benefit of souls, and it thwarts Satan’s plan. I know it sounds like a strange thing to offer to our Lord, but He tells us to bring all our troubles and trials to Him.

If you continue to have problems with prayer then it is probably your own concupiscence. Still offer this up, and pray for God to give you the grace to overcome this problem.

Be Not Afraid

2009-07-11T19:08:00.000-07:00

We have a wonderful woman teaching us the background and meaning of our Sunday readings. The reading and study of Amos impressed me this time. Amos took care of sheep and was the keeper of the sycamore when God called him to become a prophet. He is considered to be the earliest of “writing” prophets. God was disappointed with the Israelites and sent Amos as His prophet. God was sadden by His people because they had become greedy! Amos had a difficult task because everyone was prosperous and didn’t care to listen to him. He was also bold because he was not a professional prophet. He was an unknown in the temple. The professional prophets were attached to the king and his court, and religion was all for political gain. The religious authorities of that time didn’t want Amos around because he threatened their power.

In the Gospel reading of Mark we see Jesus sends the disciples out, much like God sent Amos. We know the background of the disciples and they certainly were not professional prophets. They trusted Jesus by showing they were not afraid. Each left with one tunic to be as beggars relying on the hospitality of others. They were to shake the dust off of their sandals when a town rejected their message. One living in these times did not want pagan soil on their shoes.

I am reminded of the phrase we sing and hear, “Be not afraid, I go before you always.” God promises if we but trust, He will provide. And when we come to that place where we are rejected because of God, when it is evident that harden hearts won’t soften for Him, we are directed to shake the rejection from our feet and travel on unafraid in His Way!

Lord, help us to know when to stay and when to walk away. Give us courage to journey in your light. Amen

Phantom Fat? More like Phantom Skinny!

2009-07-09T14:34:00.001-07:00

Visited the doctor today only to find out I'd gained back the eight or nine pounds I'd lost. I needed to keep it off, and then take some more off too. It made me think of something I heard recently. Something that made me laugh. I'm not saying what I heard is not true, but I have a different spin on it. The term I heard was "Phantom Fat!" This is a situation where someone overweight or obese has a weight loss. The problem is, even though they lose weight they still feel like they are fat. Over many years the individual has become accustomed to having the fat and so still believe they are fat when they are not.

When I heard that it all made sense to me. My problem isn't Phantom Fat, it's Phantom Skinny! I used to be skinny, so now that I've put on weight I just don't think I'm as big as I am. Don't get me wrong, I know my size has increased. My clothing alone tells me that, but I just don't get it until I see the dreaded photograph. I took for granted, for most of my career, the weigh-in at work. I watched people sweating the scale. It wasn't until the end of my career that I became one of those sweating! So here I sit with a term for my condition, Phantom Skinny. My skinny has disappeared and some how, some way, real fat has taken it's place.

Lord, thank you for the bounty you supply. And I truly know the "some how" for my fat. Forgive me for when I am a glutton...and please let someone discover a "real" get rid of fat pill with no bad side effects! (Doesn't hurt to ask or dream LOL) Remember God created humor, I just wish there was a way to literally laugh my "rear end" off!

Dreaming of those Deceased ~

2009-07-07T17:59:00.000-07:00

Last night my husband asked me what I was doing today. I rattled off some possibilities. Then I asked, “Why?” He said, “Tomorrow is my Dad’s birthday, and I told my Mom we’d go to the cemetery. Right then, I knew the priority for today was going with my husband and mother-in-law.

When my husband and I married, his dad was deceased for over a decade. I remember feeling sad knowing his dad wouldn’t be at our wedding. I was also thankful I had my own memories of my father-in-law. These memories are clouded because each comes from childhood. When I met up with my husband again, I hadn’t seen him since he was in the fifth grade. But two different nights before we married, I dreamt about my father-in-law. The most vivid one consisted of us all sitting down for dinner. I woke up feeling very good.

The other couple I was sad about before I married was my grandparents. My paternal grandfather died before I was born and paternal grandmother when I was very young. My maternal grandparents were around for a very long time, but both died before I married Tim. I was in my late thirties at this time. One night I dreamt I was at a wedding reception. My grandpa was there wearing a very fine suit. I asked, “Where is Granny?” He reached behind him, and she stepped forward holding his hand. Once again I woke up feeling very good.

I truly believe God was sending me a message. The message of course was one of family. He was letting me know, you may not see them, but they will be there. Just like He is here, and wherever He is, there is the Son and the Holy Spirit. We sometimes forget we are ONE Body of Christ. We are still united to those who have gone before us in His Body; only a thin veil of physical death separates us from that cloud of witnesses. The cloud of witnesses we read of in Hebrews ~ surrounding us always.

Angel of God, My Guardian Dear

2009-07-04T19:32:00.000-07:00

Our Lord’s words in Scripture lets us know that every child has an angel to guard him or her: “See that you do not despise one of these little ones; for I tell you that in heaven their angels see the face of my heavenly Father continually (Matt 18:10) Theologians teach this is not only for children but all of us, an angel given to us from birth to death.

We’ve seen more interest in angels in the last couple of decades. When I was small my friends, who were not Catholic, never spoke of their Guardian Angels. My mother, who is Baptist, prayed with me every night. Even though guardian angels were not emphasized in her religious tradition back then, she made sure I was aware of mine. I would ask her where my angel was, and she’d tell me right behind me. I almost threw me neck out trying to catch a glimpse of my angel. Over the years there have been instances where I believe my angel has guided, instructed, warned and whispered. I plan to post one such event this August. Even though I’ve had some close encounters, I still ignore this wonderful messenger and helpmate sent to me by God. I’m praying that I will be able to grow closer to this particular grace bestowed by our Lord.

If you have a story of an encounter with an angel or angels, I would sure like to hear about it! Please leave a comment.

May God place His angels around you and keep you safe!

One Nation Above God ~ What?!

2009-07-03T11:25:00.000-07:00

Obviously the title of this post is a play on words. Hopefully it will be thought provoking. The correct version should read, One Nation Under God. It seems to me this is part of our problem though. We as a people have put ourselves above God and others. The more advanced mankind becomes the more we seem to regress when it comes to God. It is kind of like when my mom used to tell me, “You’re getting a little too big for your britches!” What happens when we block out God? His grace doesn’t flow as freely. It’s not Him, it’s us. My dad uses the illustration of a dirty window. We have dirtied the window so all of the light doesn’t shine through!

This Independence Day let’s take a moment to remember we are actually dependent on God’s love, grace and mercy. When we gaze into the darkened sky anticipating an explosion of colorful fireworks, we need to think that beyond the darkness in our own lives the Son of God is waiting to shine upon us. Also we don’t want to forget to clean the windows of our souls, the view is more spectacular than the best fireworks and the fire of His love never fizzles out!

Have a happy and blessed 4th of July. Thank you to those who are serving our Country and freedom, thanks to those who have served, those wounded and those who sacrificed their lives.

Make Time for the Divine ~ Finding Peace

2009-07-01T17:06:00.000-07:00

Time is such an odd idea once you contemplate eternity. Just to name a few methods, mankind measures and marks off time by seconds, hours, days, weeks, season and years. Time can be remembered by birthdays, graduations, anniversaries and deaths. Some of my readings are touching on the idea we all have of “if only.” If only I can get that first job, I’ll be happy. Maybe it’s if only I can buy a house, I’ll be happy. There are possibly infinite “if only, I’ll be happy” scenarios, but is our mission in life to be happy 24/7? Does this really happen for anyone? I can’t see how. Eventually we experience illness, death of loved ones, ridicule, gossip, no chocolate (not devastating, but disappointing) and all kind of unhappy events.

Rather than waiting on the next event or success to make us happy, we should focus on the present moment. In taking more of mankind’s measured time to spend with God, I’m finding a place of peace. Not just peace of heart, but the peace that passes all understanding. This is probably a bad analogy, but it is like riding in a car with someone you love. You don’t have to make small talk. The two of you can just ride along knowing the silence doesn’t diminish your love for one another. This is how my time with our Lord has been the last couple of days. You may wonder what I’m doing different. The difference is I’m spending more time with God. I’ve started praying the Chaplet of Divine Mercy at 3:00 pm (the time we believe Jesus expired on the cross). After prayer, I’m reading some books I didn’t have “time” for. My night reading and prayer schedule remain unchanged, but adding another time for prayer and study is a renewal. Maybe just maybe, God is getting it through my thick skull when He says, “quit running ahead, take some time, and just walk with me for awhile.”

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If you are unfamiliar with the Chaplet of Divine Mercy, following are some of the prayers:

Eternal Father, I offer You the Body and Blood, Soul and Divinity of Your dearly beloved Son, Our Lord Jesus Christ, in atonement for our sins and those of the whole world.

For the sake of His sorrowful Passion, have mercy on us and on the whole world.

Holy God, Holy Mighty One, Holy Immortal One, have mercy on us and on the whole world.

Read more about Divine Mercy.

Fountain of Love

2009-06-29T13:38:00.000-07:00

One constant in my readings lately has been water. In the Novena to The Divine Mercy, we read, “Today bring to Me all mankind, especially all sinners, and immerse them in the ocean of My mercy.” The book Divine Intimacy reads, “O Lord Jesus, O immense ocean, why do You wait to absorb this little drop of water in Your immensity? (St. Gertrude) And my last post touched on casting our nets, as St. Peter did into the water when directed by Our Lord.

As most of us are aware, water is life giving. Not only does it nourish us physically but also spiritually in the waters of baptism. Each time we walk past the holy water font, we dip our fingers and make the sign of the cross. This remembering of our baptismal promises in the name of the Father, Son and Holy Spirit is a powerful reminder of becoming more Christ like. And this is not just one moment as Christians; it is a life time conversion.

Lord you supply the water of life, help us to remember to come frequently to the fountain of your Love to drink. Amen

Casting Our Net and Trusting God

2009-06-28T08:17:00.000-07:00

Lately I keep having the recurring thought of even if something is good it still does not mean it is God’s will for us. The reading for today, in the book Divine Intimacy, hit this thought on the head again. “…for it is the consciousness of our nothingness which leads us to put all our confidence in God, and the greater this confidence becomes in us, the more convinced we are of our nothingness.”

The reading goes on to highlight the story of Peter as the fisherman, not catching anything, and our Lord coming along to tell him to lower his nets. The parallel is, we try to force things or hold on to things and find our own hands empty. The point being Our Lord gives with divine generosity, but insists on humility of heart. (St. Therese of the Child Jesus)

Finally the colloquy ends with, “As soon as You see me fully convinced of my nothingness, You stretch out Your hand to me; but if I should try to do something great, even under the pretext of zeal, You desert me. So all I have to do is to humble myself, to bear with meekness my imperfections. Herein lies, for me, true holiness.”

Do you ever feel like God is trying to drive something home with you? As some of you have read in my posts, I feel like I’m waiting on what to do? The message I received today is empty yourself of your ideas of what you want, and if you do this and trust God, He will fill your net. So that is where I am, casting my net, and leaving it there until Our Lord tells me to haul it in. And I have to be willing to leave it there for days, weeks, months or years, whatever it takes.

What is your Gift?

2009-06-24T12:07:00.000-07:00

This morning at Mass, our priest was giving the homily on St. John the Baptist. He spoke of how John’s gift was the prophecy of Jesus. He went on to say that we all have gifts, and God created us for a reason, a purpose.

I started thinking about how most of us have or had grand ideas of being or doing something magnificent. We feel like if we’re supposed to do something for God it must be big! Because we sense the grandeur of God we are compelled to believe we are a part of something big. No matter what we accomplish here on earth, we eventually realize we are a small part of His might.

St. Therese, the Little Flower is a good example for us when it comes to doing our part. Her Little Way was to do small things with love. While she was living on earth did she know that one day her writings and life would have an impact for generations?

The lesson I learned today is if we sin in the dark and our sin affects the Body of Christ, if we do some small goodness, it also affects His Body. It helps accomplish His plan whether it is a smile, kind word or prayer. Also as evident in some blogs I read, people who suffer or suffered abuse and injustice contribute to His Body, by sharing their struggles, growth and triumph. Do they realize how many people they touch? Some may tell them how their words helped them, but others will quietly absorb their message never relaying how it changed their life.

St. John the Baptist had the gift of prophecy. What is our gift? Each day, each opportunity we have to spread the goodness of God is our gift, by the work of our hands, the words from our lips and the action of our hearts. What gift did you share today?

The Potter's Waiting Lesson Again

2009-06-22T14:36:00.000-07:00

This morning I opened the top to my kiln only to see that something exploded during the firing. After I took everything out I noticed three things blew up. I was happy that every other item inside was not affected by this explosion.

I learned my lesson. I was eager to fire some other things and wanted to fill the kiln. The problem was the pottery that "blew" wasn't quite dry. It appeared dry, but I know that appearances can be deceiving.

Sure I hate the three pieces I worked on (hand formed) are no good now, but I had to laugh. It reminded me again how God is the Potter. Sometimes we, as the clay, jump into the fire before we're ready. When God wants us to wait, it's for a good reason. By using the time for prayer, reading and meditating we are preparing for when He tells us to move or "jump!" Otherwise we may end up like the clay pieces I cleaned up this morning, broken, jagged and splintered shards.

Lord as I sit and wait, please remind me your timing is perfect. Help me to see it is worth the wait. Amen

Divine Intimacy Hurting the One We Love

2009-06-21T18:29:00.000-07:00

There is this man who sits in front of us in church. He is always giving me little notes with a cross on each and words spelling out something from the scripture of the day. He also has a book titled Divine Intimacy. After looking through it one Sunday, I decided to get this book too.

The following sentence is from the colloquy at the end of one particular reading. 'These wounds which you see in the midst of My hands I have received in the house of those who love me.'

Isn't it the truth? When we hurt it's usually because of someone we care about. If it's a stranger we will eventually let it go, but a family member or a friend may cause us to dwell on the hurt. The wound can fester and become bigger than the original cause. We've seen the bitterness people carry around; sometimes forgetting what started it all. Other times the pain inflicted is a deep and lasting pain, causing years of scars and long roads to recovery. Some hurts are fatal.

The reverse is true also. When we cause pain, again it is usually directed towards a loved one.
This is what we do when we sin. If we love our Lord why do we continue to hurt Him? His example is forgiveness. This book of Divine Intimacy leads my thoughts to His Divine Mercy. When I hurt people, consciously or not, I am hurting Jesus. And when people hurt me, will I be able to forgive them and show the mercy God shows us? The answer is ~ only with His Grace.

Lord please remind me when I hurt others, I'm hurting you. Teach me to handle the pain and injustice in my own life by following You and the Way of the Cross.

POTUS Obama Please Explain ~ I'm Confused

2009-06-19T14:32:00.000-07:00

I just heard President Obama remarked "Fathers need to step up. Their job doesn't end with conception." So what is he saying here? Does he believe a father becomes a parent at conception? If so, doesn't the mother? And if that's the case aren't they parents of a child?

It appears that our President believes life begins at conception. He also believes women should have a choice. That choice, if so desired, is to take an innocent child's life. I don't see where he can tell fathers they need to step up when he is in effect falling down by closing his eyes and his heart to those not given a chance to live.

Please remember to pray for unborn children and their parents. Also remember to pray for mothers who have aborted. They are often victims themselves, as are some fathers. Finally pray our President has a change of heart!

God is So Good ~ Good in Good Times and Bad

2009-06-18T11:57:00.000-07:00

Just a quick note here. It is funny to me when good things happen to people, they are quick to say, "God is so good!" The truth is, God is always good. He is perfect goodness. Thankfully He is good in good times and in bad. The times I've appreciated God's goodness the most, were the times I was probably the saddest. Don't get me wrong, I am thankful for the many blessings He has given me. The thing is when I've needed Him the most, through the painful and the loneliest, He has been ever present to reassure and encourage me.

We may change Lord, but you never do. Thank you for your sustaining goodness in our lives! Amen

Freedom from Bugs vs Real Freedom

2009-06-16T17:03:00.000-07:00

My blog was going to be only one line long this evening. It was going to be one question. Why did God create bugs? ...the gnats, the mosquitoes, the real nuisance bugs. Freedom from bugs was on my mind, but when I started reading the tweets on twitter, bugs suddenly became trivial. One tweet after another is about the chaos happening in Iran. These are real people, like you and me, and they are fighting for their lives in the name of freedom. While we have thoughts of freedom from bugs, from a hated job, from financial problems...some of them are giving their lives for freedom from bondage. They're risking death so others will be able to choose in life.

In thanksgiving, I praise God that I live in a free country. I pray it remains this way.
And I'm reminded how His Son, our Savior, handed over His life that we may have eternal life.
Freedom unending!

Please remember those who are suffering throughout Iran and the world.

Corpus Christi - The Body of Christ

2009-06-14T09:38:00.000-07:00

The Body of Christ!

I just want to take a moment to relay something I read years ago. It was a book written by a medical doctor. I wish I remembered the title! Anyway he related the Body of Christ to the human body. We individuals tend to value people by the career they've chosen, their education, social standing, and wealth. We look at someone who picks up our trash and think it's okay for them, but I don't want to do that. We look at a surgeon and think what a smart, valuable individual.

The truth is, we'd be just as lost without the trash collector as with the surgeon. Can you imagine what would happen? Trash would pile up, it would stink. We would have to haul it off or burn it. We would have to HOPE our neighbor would do the same. What illnesses could occur from the filth?

Now as for as the human body there are cells flowing through it carrying the necessary life force in our blood. But there are also cells carrying away trash. If these cells didn't do the job can you again imagine what would happen? I think we'd become really ill and eventually die. Every part of our human body has a job to do. That job may belong to the eye, the heart, the arm or the brain. That job may belong to the intestine, the liver and yes to cells carrying trash.

The point is every member of the Body of Christ is valuable. We simply don't always realize that value.

When we come to the altar to receive Our Lord and Savior in the true presence of the Eucharist, let us come in thanksgiving for the whole Body of Christ!

Staying Connected

2009-06-13T13:35:00.000-07:00

Saturday morning is the sleep in time for me. It's the one day out of seven, I'm thrown out of a routine. But there is a bit of a routine. I usually end up at my parents' house for lunch. Both are in their eighties, so I grab all the moments I can with them. Sometimes I'm so focused on "what's to come" that I forget about the "right now." I forget how blessed I am to have this time with them. When we are young we think things will never change, such as Christmas every year at Grannie's house. But as we become older, we know things change but still forget to absorb the "here and now."

So here and now I want to thank God for the many blessings I take for granted. I want to remember to start each day and begin each night with Him. I want to remember that any good in my life comes through His love. And I want Him to take my hand and gently walk me through what's to come.

Remember It Still Happens

2009-06-11T16:55:00.000-07:00

Years ago, after the sacrament of reconciliation, the priest gave me a penance of praying for those being martyred and persecuted. I never forgot that because I didn't give it much thought, if any, before then. At least for now we live in a place where people can practice their faith, and so it's easy to forget others are forbidden to do so. Ever since that conversation with this particular priest my daily prayer intentions include these brothers and sisters of ours. I changed the original request a bit because it only involved a couple of countries.

My prayer today is: Lord we pray for strength and courage for those being persecuted and martyred throughout the world for the Kingdom of God. Amen.

Whenever you have the chance please remember these modern day martyrs and saints.

Never Opening Doors

2009-06-10T16:37:00.000-07:00

It seems like sometimes I don't know what to do with my time. My mind races in so many directions. No matter how many times I ask God what I'm suppose to be doing, it seems like sit and wait is the answer. That's fine, but I still feel like I'm wasting time.

My current thought is I pray, make an attempt at something, and if it doesn't pan out I know God doesn't want that for me. So instead of "...when He closes one door, He opens another," I'm choosing "...sometimes He doesn't open the door." That means I have to move along and choose another door. Or who knows, I may have to go through the window or be lowered through the roof. Anyway, I do know I'll end up wherever God wants me. I always do!

Road Work

2009-06-09T10:24:00.000-07:00

It seems like today everywhere I turned road work was going on. I've had to detour on dirt roads, move over for big flashing arrows and dodge street painters. It's funny because when I leave the house, I assume the road I'm travelling will be the same as I last saw it. Then the upset happens.

How many times in my life's journey have I been forced to detour, taking the road unplanned? How many times did I have to stop and wait or move over? How many times have I said not my will O Lord but yours? The answer to the last question is probably not enough, but I have prayed that prayer often. So why am I still surprised when God upsets the course by detouring me, causing me to wait or requiring I move over? Instead of thinking of the inconvenience maybe I should think of the dangers He thwarts, the direction He desires, the timing that is only His and the following that I should cherish.

Solemnity of the Most Holy Trinity

2009-06-07T07:39:00.000-07:00

This wonderful feast day is a reminder of the mystery of God. The Trinity has always been a confusing idea for me and others, and I certainly don't pretend to have an inkling of understanding this reality. The three leaves on the shamrock help somewhat, but what my Dad told me once helps me even more. My Dad used himself as an example. He is one man, but he is my father, he is his parent's son and he is my mother's spouse. When we think of the Trinity, hopefully we're focusing on relationship. Not only the relationship of God the Father, God the Son and God the Holy Spirit, but our relationship with each in God.

When we make the sign of the cross we are remembering the Godhead.

Lord, we believe, help our unbelief, and help us to cultivate our relationship with you! Amen

A Perfect World

2009-06-04T16:14:00.000-07:00

Have you ever wondered what our world would be like if sin never entered into the picture? Would every blade of grass be the same height and perfectly green? Would people's ears be aligned, instead of one being higher than the other? :) What would our world be like?

For some reason a tree always comes to mind. Maybe because it is a symbol of life. The perfect tree would have the perfect shape with perfect leaves. But we know that's not the case in our world. But when I look at a tree with a lopsided shape or leaves missing in winter, I still see beauty. At first the tree may appear unappealing, but then the trunk may twist and turn in an interesting pattern. Or a bird's nest, hidden in leaves, rests tightly in a crook. Suddenly looking beyond the mangled mass, we see beauty. That's how I think God looks at us. He sees what is beautiful in His creation. When we focus on the ugly we miss the good in ourselves and others. This isn't God's way, it's the way of the one who brought imperfection to our world.

God help us not to be discouraged in ourselves or others. Help us to look beyond the imperfections to see your image stamped on all souls! Amen.

Natural and Supernatural Habits

2009-06-03T11:14:00.000-07:00

F.J. Sheed wrote, Our soul has the supernatural power to act towards God, but it has a natural habit of acting for self, ignoring God.

He goes on to point out the supernatural refers to making that which we can't see as the goal, but we're distracted by the natural, the attractions of the visible. This is the struggle.

Serious sin and our choice of self stops the supernatural grace that flows through us from God. We lose, so supernaturally we become dead.

Sheed follows this with the thought we may still have faith and hope, but each is no longer life giving without love. Love is what nourishes the soul's life and habits. That is why of the three love is the greatest!

Still Here

2009-06-02T18:13:00.001-07:00

I haven't fallen off the face of the earth (yet). It's just my husband has been using the office and three computers, so I just leave it to him. Hopefully, I'll get the chance to get back to see what everyone is blogging!

Until then....have a super evening!

IHS rules!

Pentecost Sunday

2009-05-31T07:48:00.000-07:00

John 20:19-23

19 Then, the same day at evening, being the first day of the week, when the doors were shut where the disciples were assembled, for fear of the Jews, Jesus came and stood in the midst, and said to them, “Peace be with you.” 20 When He had said this, He showed them His hands and His side. Then the disciples were glad when they saw the Lord. 21 So Jesus said to them again, “Peace to you! As the Father has sent Me, I also send you.” 22 And when He had said this, He breathed on them, and said to them, “Receive the Holy Spirit. 23 If you forgive the sins of any, they are forgiven them; if you retain the sins of any, they are retained.”

When Jesus bestowed on the disciples the power to forgive sins, it was on Easter Sunday. This is important because of the connection of the Resurrection with spiritual life. Also he breathed this power on the Apostles. The only other time God breathed on anyone was when He breathed life into the first human being (Genesis 2:7). Jesus gives the disciples the authority to forgive, and not to forgive.

Reconciliation shines in a new light when I read this passage. Sin brings death, and reconciliation brings a new breath of life. God is so good to us! Come Holy Spirit.

The Name of Jesus

2009-05-29T07:53:00.001-07:00

Once I read a small booklet on the power of the name of Jesus. Just saying His name, I believe, sends ripples of goodness through the universe, through eternity. But there are times when I need to call on Him, and I don't. I try to handle things myself, at my speed. Why do I do this? The only answer can be "self." When I see this "self" why don't I say "Come Holy Spirit?" This request will root out "self." So all I can figure is... ~ I'm still hanging on to "self."

Jesus may every tongue (including this one) sing your name!

Come Holy Spirit ~ Stay Holy Spirit ~ Dwell in us Holy Spirit

Amen

Where Does the Time Go and What to Do?

2009-05-28T11:34:00.000-07:00

It seems like May has flown away quicker than it arrived. My husband has needed the office, so I've been spending more time away from the computer.

In four short months I will be retired for a total of two years, and I still don't know what I'm doing. My parents are in their eighties, but both are for now in decent health. I do visit them often. My day consists of Mass, exercise and whatever pops up. Believe me when I say, I feel like a jack of all trades and master of none. I enjoy drawing, painting, writing and pottery, but I don't focus on any of the listed very well. I keep asking God what He wants me to do. I know there are many good things to do, but just because something is good doesn't necessarily mean it's God's will.

So I continue to move along with each day, hoping I'm doing what God wants me to do for that moment. But I sure would appreciate your prayers. God really knows, sometimes it takes a good hit in the head for me to get His messages! Peace, joy and blessings to all!