Before we can serve God in other fields we must till, plant, weed, prune and bear fruit in our own fields.
The will precedes the intellect.
Everyday I have little readings I do, and the first sentence is a paraphrase from one. The second comes from a CD set I was listening to earlier.
You know how you can read several pages or listen to thirty minutes of something, and out of it all you find a couple of nuggets of wisdom or teachings? When you go back to it later, what you see or hear can be something totally different. I’m trying to make a habit of writing down what strikes me that day, whether it comes from my pastor, family, friend, reading or a talking donkey. Okay I don’t expect to find a talking donkey or anything, but you never know. It can happen right?
The first sentence struck me because of what I am always asking God. What am I suppose to be doing? I never get a good feel for the answer. This sentence makes me think, “Maybe I’m not ready to do what God desires because I haven’t tended my own field.” Tending our own field requires a lifetime of cultivating, but we should bear some fruit at some point!
Then the second sentence struck me because there is the constant fight. My will wants to do one thing when my intellect knows I should do something else. My will either justifies the end or figures it’s not so bad after all. But no matter how small the infraction, it chips away at the rich soil my soul should be steeped in. How can I grow the tree to bear fruit, if I’m not enriching my soul? My friend Karinann’s blog post, Out With The Old, In With The New, touched on the same subject. At first I thought how discouraging this “trying” to become anew can be. Then it came to me. It is better to be questioning than to think everything is okay. I think when I’m rolling along that track saying and thinking, “I’m okay” is when I am in the greatest danger. So I pray God will help me to examine my actions or lack of action and continually tend my soul for His desire.