Sunday, July 19, 2009

A Parent's Lament

My children will tell you I was an overprotective mother, which is true to a certain degree. I grew up when children roamed neighborhoods, and doors were left unlocked. By the time my children were born, we heard stories of child abduction and warnings such as, don’t put your child’s name on shirts, backpacks, etc…This was because a predator could call the name acting like they knew the child.

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There are certainly regrets I have from raising my children but being overprotective isn’t one of them. The regret is my selfishness and not spending more time with them. Don’t get me wrong my two boys gave me some gray hairs.

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One particularly bad day, I was taking a bath and lamenting to our Lord. I use the word “lamenting” because it just sounds better than complaining. Anyway, I was lamenting the fact that I must be a sorry parent because I was having a tough time with these boys. As I continued to groan about my inadequacies, God interrupted my thoughts. He said, “Listen, I’m the perfect parent and look at my children running amuck!” I really didn’t expect God to use a work like “amuck!” I expected something like, “Listen thou, I am thy perfect parent and gaze upon my children sinning endlessly.” But He said “amuck.” Well that got my attention, and I said, “You’re right, Father.” He probably smiled when I said He was right, because He’s always right. He didn’t need me to confirm it. Feeling much better, I thanked Him and seeing as we were chatting already, I asked Him a question. “Father, when you’re talking about your children not always acting like little angels, are you talking about me?” I waited. I asked, “God?” I waited again and still no answer, maybe a chuckle but no answer. Opening my mouth to lament the fact he wouldn’t answer, I realized He was talking about me. He is the perfect parent, and we are his imperfect children. The good news is He loves us imperfections and all...even when we are running “amuck!”

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Father, thank you for loving us through the good and bad times. Amen

5 comments:

Just Be Real said...

Dear one, thank you for being open and honest. I know it must pain you to reflect back to times in your life where you could have improved. That is why it is called "life" I suppose.

It is so comforting to know that no matter what we do our Heavenly Father loves us unconditionally. Hard to apply many times for me, but I hold on to that truth.

Thank you for sharing dear one!

HeartfeltHeartLook said...

When they are small you think time drags on, and they'll never grow up. But when they're grown it seems to have gone so fast! That's why I wish I had a do-over. Thanks JBR.

Lisa Marie said...

I wish I could hear the things you do with such simplicity, it seems. Thankfully He showed you that no one is perfect in their parenting no matter how hard they try!

HeartfeltHeartLook said...

Lisa Marie,

I didn't always hear him, sometimes I just knew He was there. And then sometimes He still seems silent to me. But usually it's when I need to just wait. Keep talking to Him, and you'll find the conversation isn't just one ways as it so often feels. God bless you!

Colleen said...

I have an award for you at my blog! God bless.